"Mrs. Hefsteder: Three years ago our Johnny died. We thought there was no hope, but then we discovered the United Appeal for the Dead. They showed us that despite Johnny's handicap, he could still be a useful member of our family and the community. Our United Appeal for the Dead caseworker showed us that the absence of life from Johnny's body didn't have to mean his absence from our daily lives."

"PA Announcement: This is not a drill - drills go Black-and-Decker-Black-and-Decker-Black-and-Decker..."

"A.M. Newscaster: It's 19 minutes after the hour, and now it's time for our daily feature The Astrological Hour. A quick reminder these reports are not intended to foster belief in astrology, but merely to support people who cannot take responsibility for their own lives."

"Loo: What was that? This is not a chawade. We need total concentwation."

"Argon Spokesman: At Argon, we're working to keep your money!"

"Announcer: It's been said that the test of a man's courage is how he performs in the face of danger. Well, in the next half hour, you're gonna meet a very unique breed of cat. The kind of man who doesn't know the meaning of the word fear. Rex Kramer, part-time airline mechanic, full-time daredevil. A man willing to risk his life for the sake of adventure. He has to chase it, confront it, and whip it. Rex Kramer, Danger Seeker!"

"Bill Bixby - Himself (segment "Headache Clinic")"

"Game Show Announcer: Guard number one is a senior on Klahn's mountain, and aspires to be a research chemist. Welcome, please, Hung Well! Guard number two is a real skating buff. A warm welcome for Long Wang! Traveling comes naturally to guard number three, as he's a licensed airplane pilot. Welcome, please, Enormous Genitals!"

"Marilyn Joi - Cleopatra Schwartz (segment "Cleopatra Schwartz")"

"Henry Gibson - Himself (segment "United Appeal for the Dead")"

"William Tregoe - John Fitzsimmons (segment "A.M. Today")"

"Eloise Hardt - Sheila Hamilton (segment "A.M. Today")"

"Derek Murcott - Pennington (segment "A Fistful of Yen")"

"Bong Soo Han - Dr. Klahn (segment "A Fistful of Yen")"

"Evan C. Kim - Loo (segment "A Fistful of Yen")"

"Eric Micklewood - Asquith (segment "A Fistful of Yen")"

"Rams plagued by fumbles as earthquakes rock Los Angeles, film at eleven."

"Argon Spokesman: Here at our multi-billion dollar refinery in Fairbanks, we're extracting 2.5 billion barrels of crude oil each day from teenagers' faces."

"Moscow in flames, missiles headed to New York, film at eleven."

"Donald Sutherland - The Clumsy Waiter (segment "That's Armageddon")"

"Tara Strohmeier - Girl (segment "Eyewitness News")"

"It is also important to know what to do you when you die. 1) Don't try to drive a car. 2) Do not operate heavy machinery. 3) Do not talk."

"The popcorn you are eating has been pissed in, film at eleven."

"We are building a fighting force of extraordinary magnitude. We forge our spirits in the tradition of our ancestors. You have our gratitude."

"[telephone rings, answering machine picks up] Herro. This is Dr. Klahn. I'm not home right now. Leave a message when you hear the beep. You have our gratitude. [gong sound]"

"[after decapitating a prisoner] Now take him to be tortured!"

"No! Not water! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ohhh! I'm melting! I'm melting! What a world, what a world! It was a fighting force of extraordinary magnitude!"

"Never before has the beauty of the sexual act been so crassly exploited!"

"Brutal! Savage! Beyond Perversion!"

"Although, so far there's no known treatment for death's crippling effects, still everyone can acquaint himself with the three early warning signs of death: one, rigor mortis; two, a rotting smell; three, occasional drowsiness."

"In the past year, over 800,000 Americans have died. Despite millions of dollars of research, death continues to be our nation's number one killer."

"I'm not wearing any pants, film at eleven."

"Lock Martin - Gort"

"What is this invader from another planet... Can it destroy the Earth?"

"Michael Rennie - Klaatu"

"Strange Power From Another Planet Menaces The Earth!"

"Patricia Neal - Helen Benson"

"A robot and a man . . . hold the world spellbound with new and startling powers from another planet!"

"The screen has never conceived a creature like this!"

"Hugh Marlowe - Tom Stevens"

"Billy Gray - Bobby Benson"

"I think that Tammy, her monologue is completely optimistic, totally [looking] to a better place—the cosmos—and she has learned so much from this experience. And I think that Urp, in his farewell speech to these pathetic lifeforms, gives a real strong hint that there are darker days ahead. It's a pretty good indication of where things were."

"Sam Jaffe - Prof. Jacob Barnhardt"

"From Out Of Space... A Warning And An Ultimatum!"

"Frances Bavier - Mrs. Barley"

"It was a gift for your President… with it, he could have studied life on other planets."

"I am fearful when I see people substituting fear for reason."

"I am leaving soon, and you will forgive me if I speak bluntly. The universe grows smaller every day, and the threat of aggression by any group, anywhere, can no longer be tolerated. There must be security for all or no one is secure. Now, this does not mean giving up any freedom except the freedom to act irresponsibly. Your ancestors knew this when they made laws to govern themselves and hired policemen to enforce them. We of the other planets have long accepted this principle. We have an organization for the mutual protection of all planets and for the complete elimination of aggression. The test of any such higher authority is, of course, the police force that supports it. For our policemen, we created a race of robots. Their function is to patrol the planets—in space ships like this one—and preserve the peace. In matters of aggression, we have given them absolute power over us; this power can not be revoked. At the first sign of violence, they act automatically against the aggressor. The penalty for provoking their action is too terrible to risk. The result is that we live in peace, without arms or armies, secure in the knowledge that we are free from aggression and war—free to pursue more profitable enterprises. Now, we do not pretend to have achieved perfection, but we do have a system, and it works. I came here to give you these facts. It is no concern of ours how you run your own planet. But if you threaten to extend your violence, this Earth of yours will be reduced to a burned-out cinder. Your choice is simple: Join us and live in peace, or pursue your present course and face obliteration. We shall be waiting for your answer; the decision rests with you."

"Gort! Klaatu barada nikto!"

"Klaatu: You have faith, Professor Barnhardt?"