"Vat do you mean you haven't got proof? Dat is no excuse! Arrezt zem! Vat? Vere? Vy? VEN? From now on, ven in doubt, arrezt zem! Arrezt zem! Arrezt zem! Arrezt zem! Zen shoot zem and interrogate zem! Oh, you are right, just shoot zem!"

"Without Jews, fags, and gypsies, there is no theater."

"[to Anna] Listen, sweetheart, if I don't come back, I forgive you for whatever happened between you and Lt. Sobinsky... but if I do come back, you're in a lot of trouble!"

"James Haake - Sasha"

"Scott Beach - Narrator"

"Terence Marsh - Startled British officer"

"Tucker Smith - Klotskis Klown"

"Phil Adams - Airport sentry"

"Curt Lowens - Airport officer"

"Larry Rosenberg - Rifka's husband"

"Milt Jamin - Gestapo soldier"

"Wolf Muser - Desk sergeant"

"Max Brooks - Rifka's son"

"Henry Brandon- Nazi officer"

"[about Frederick] He's world famous in Poland."

"Ladies and gentlemen: In the interest of clarity and sanity, the rest of this movie will not be in Polish."

"Paul Ratliff - Naval officer"

"Oh, but that's enough talk about me. Let's talk about you. How'd you like me in the first act?"

"Patrick Fischler as Vincenzo"

"Randall Park as Henderson"

"Larry Wilmore as Williams"

"Kristen Schaal as Susana"

"Alex Parlar as Santiago Pérez"

"Jeff Dunham as Lewis / Debbie"

"Alex Borstein as Martha (Barry's Wife / Therman's Girlfriend)"

"Chris O'Dowd as Marco (credited as "Christopher O'Dowd")"

"David Walliams as Mueller"

"Rick Overton as The Beard Champion"

"P. J. Byrne as Davenport"

"Andrea Savage as Robin"

"Octavia Spencer as Madame Nora"

"Bruce Greenwood as Lance Fender"

"Ron Livingston as Caldwell"

"Paul Rudd as Timothy J. "Tim" Conrad"

"Stephanie Szostak as Julie"

"Jemaine Clement as Kieran Vollard"

"Steve Carell as Barry Speck"

"Lucy Punch as Darla"

"Zach Galifianakis as Therman Murch"

"Dennis Quaid as Lar"

"Ringo Starr as Atouk"

"It's dopey, but it's also lots of fun."

"...the characters don't exactly speak. They grunt and gesture in a language the audience gradually comes to understand. This doesn't make them any less articulate than many characters in movies with more elaborate scripts."

"Given the Neanderthal concepts of humor guiding so many recent movie comedies, the new slapstick farce "Caveman" is obviously a numbskull consummation -- the Neanderthal comedy about Neanderthals."

"John Matuszak as Tonda"

"Avery Schreiber as Ock"

"Richard Moll as Abominable Snowman"