"I love you, Millie. Now maybe that's just my programming talking, but guess what? Somebody wrote that program. I'm just a love letter to you. Somewhere out there is the author."

"Kenneth Israel as Businessman"

"[He touches a health icon and it surges through his body, healing all injuries] Is this what recreational drugs feel like?"

"Anabel Graetz as Cat Lady Phyllis"

"Michael Malvesti as Newsstand Vendor"

"Don't have a good day, have a great day."

"Colin Allen as Shoe Store Clerk"

"That building, that's fake! This street, it's fake! That car- [Gets rammed from behind and then bounced off a taxi]"

"Michael Tow as Rain Man"

"Naheem Garcia as Convenience Store Owner Joe"

"[Upon learning the true nature of his reality] IT'S ALL A LIE!"

"[In a montage parodying his daily routine that has him greeting his goldfish every morning] Good morning, Goldie. good morning, Goldie. Good fuckin' morning, Goldie!"

"Vernon Scott as Bank Manager"

"Hugh Jackman as Masked Player in Alley (voice)"

"Aaron W Reed as Dude (as Aaron Reed)"

"Taika Waititi as Antwan"

"Channing Tatum as Revenjamin Buttons"

"Utkarsh Ambudkar as Mouser"

"Camille Kostek as Bombshell"

"Lil Rel Howery as Buddy"

"I have three words for you; blue. Shirt. Guy."

"Everybody down on the ground !"

"Ryan Reynolds as Guy"

"Hey everyone, Dan here, from the diamond minecart and today, I will be having a poo!"

"Here's to Lazarbeam He's true blue he's a piss pot through and through"

"Jodie Comer as Millie / Molotovgirl"

"Mark Lainer as Hostage"

"[Repeated line whenever the bank is being robbed] Nobody try to be a hero. This will all be over soon."

"[Repeated line] Have the quarterly reports on my desk by Friday."

"[Watches Guy use the Captain America shield] What the shit?"

"Looks like rain!"

"Lannan Eacott as Lazarbeam"

"[Repeated line] Wow, life in the big city! Ain't nothing like it!"

"Joe Keery as Keys"

"[Repeated line] Has anyone seen my cats?"

"Mom! Do not touch that sock! I swear to God if you touch that sock you will be in therapy for the rest of your life! No! It's my special sock! Put it down!"

"Mike Devine as Officer Johnny"

"Britne Oldford as Barista"

"There are three things I love in life: Kicking ass, TBD, Third thing here"

"Sometimes I forget not everyone you meet on here is a sociopathic man-child."

"Destiny deSirène as Art Nerd (as Destiny 'Claymore' McCottrell)"

"Word of advice: don't crib your jokes from the trolls of Free City."

"Alex Trebek as Alex Trebek"

"[On being told Guy is a non-playable character] I don't care if he's Arnold Schwarz-invader! Terminate him!"

"Lara Spencer as Lara Spencer"

"John Krasinski as Silhouetted Gamer (voice)"

"Catchphrase!"

"Chris Evans as Chris Evans"