"The Cosmos: [narrated while Howard is being drawn through a wormhole] The cosmos: countless worlds upon worlds, worlds without end. In these galaxies, every possible reality exists, and what is reality on any one world is mere fantasy on all others. Here, all is real and all is illusion. What is, what was, and what will be start here with the words, "In the beginning, there was Howard the Duck!""

"I never heard of a duck that couldn't swim."

"Trust your birdness: fly!"

"Little Pond Hopper."

"I feel much better."

"Smog Inspection."

"I have no license. I am not Jack."

"It's closing time!"

"[after using his fire eyes to blow up a diner kitchen] If you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen."

"She took my eggs."

"An evil unlike any you can imagine is about to engulf the Earth."

"This will mean the extinction of all existing life forms."

"You are about to witness the end of the old world and the birth of the new."

"I no longer need human food."

"Duck kebob!"

"Different lifestyles is one thing, different life forms is another."

"I don't know where you are now, but I hope you're happier there. This world didn't treat you very good, but you saved it, didn't you?"

"[to the Dark Overlord of the Universe possessing the body of Dr. Walter Jenning] You'll get the cheque?"

"I just can't resist your intense animal magnetism."

"Come on, let's watch David Letterman."

"But if that's the way you want it, then so long, duckie!"

"Good bye, Duckworld."

"Prepare to eat beak."

"Phil, no duck is an island, and if Fate sent me here to save Earth, then Howard the Duck is ready to fight!"

"If God intended us to fly, he wouldn't have taken away our wings."

"It's not nice to fool with a Dark Overlord!"

"Great Duck in Heaven, is this the end of Howard?"

"You're ruffling my feathers! Put me down, you big, hairless ape."

"Desperate ducks commit desperate acts!"

"[guards are searching Howard] On my planet, we never say die; we say—not my shorts! You perverts!"

"I've had enough! I wanna see my lawyer! [Lieutenant Welker chuckles] I've got rights, you know! I'm suing!"

""Hit my planet"? How about "hit my living room"?! Talk about invasion of privacy!"

"That's right: space rabies! One bite, and it's agonising death in five seconds!"

"I can't sit here on my tail feathers feeling sorry for myself."

"Listen, if you got blasted millions of miles through space, ended up on another planet, and were given an I.Q. test by a janitor, you'd be a little pissed off, too!"

"[seeing some hairless apes] They look hungry. Get 'em a banana."

"Hey. If I had some place to go, I certainly wouldn't be in Cleve-Land."

"Cleve-Land? Uh huh. That's a perfect weird name for this planet."

"No one laughs at a master of quack-fu!"

"That's it, no more Mr. Nice Duck. Hey, let the female creature go! Every duck has his limit, and you, scum, have pushed me over the line."

"I'm a dead duck."

"André Sogliuzzo - Sideswipe"