"Say this blanket represents all the matter and energy in the universe, okay? This is me, this is you, And over here, this is the Eiffel Tower, right, it's Paris!"

"There is no remainder in the mathematics of Infinity."

"There's no such thing as nothing. nnn"

"There is no such thing as you or me,"

"When you get the blanket thing you can relax because everything you could ever want or be you already have and are."

"Did you see that? Shania knew who I was."

"[after Caterine snaps a photo of his sobbing] NOBODY SEES THAT PICTURE!!!"

"Why is marriage and kids so important? I mean, there's an overpopulation problem!"

"Shania cares!"

"Shania hates mayo, alright, and she can't eat chicken salad, that's no joke. We gave it to her once, she threw up in the limo - the lady hates chicken salad. So I bring out a bunch of tuna fish sandwiches - she still doesn't believe me - I say, Shania, I'm allergic to mayo - which, by the way, is a lie. Shania still doesn't believe me so I eat two of the sandwiches in front of her to prove it. So she eats one and a half sandwiches, one and a half sandwiches... before she realizes, its chicken salad. And she liked them!"

"Do I benefit from getting some great P.R. For Huckabees when we need it? Absolutely. But do I care about saving the open spaces? Yes, I do!"

"How am I not myself? [repeated]"

"Huckabees cornucopia of stuff we all want. But what happened to the gazelles? Were they squashed under the CD department?"

"What?! Is it a crime? Is it a crime to look at Lange?!"

"[to Vivian Jaffe] I can't believe you guys actually exist."

"Motherfucking cocksucker motherfucking shoot Mother what am I doing? What am I doing? I don't know what I'm doing. I'm doing the best that I can. I know that's all I can ask of myself. Is that good enough? Is my work doing any good? Is anybody paying attention? Is it hopeless to try and change things? The African guy is a sign, right? Because if he isn't, than nothing in this world makes any sense to me. I'm trapped! Maybe I should quit. Don't quit! Maybe I should just fucking quit. Don't fucking quit! I don't know what the fuck I'm supposed to do anymore! Mother! Fuck shoot!"

"Everything is the same, even if it's different."

"We're not in Infinity, we're in the suburbs"

"[about the body bag exercise] I can't go back in there. It's all hating faces that I have to chop up with a machete!"

"'Betrayed' by Albert Markovski. Is it possible for anybody in this world to work together to make it better? I don't think so."

"If this world is temporary, identity is an illusion, then everything is meaningless and it doesn't matter if you use petroleum, and that's got me very confused."

"[first lines] I gotta tell ya, Timon, that song always gets me right here."

"Why are you guys wasting all of your time fighting each other? I mean, come on, seriously. Put the egos aside for a second, guys, please. Deal with the issues, okay. We have a deadly petroleum situation, not to mention cystic f-- SHUT UP! SHUT! -- Cystic Fibrosis, civil war in Africa, toxic fish. You have children in your own community who are going to prison. Father Flavin doesn't have the money to help them! Ma'am, listen to me!"

"Aaah, here he comes! The man poet who banged France's Dark Lady of Philosophy! The parking lot crusader of truth who turned his back on his Other like a cold-blooded gangsta."

"[after being hit in the face with a rubber ball] Awesome! Can we do the ball thing everyday?"

"How come we only ask ourselves the really big questions when something bad happens?"