First Quote Added
April 10, 2026
Latest Quote Added
"My pen burst. (after hotel employee notices Clark's arm is blue from falling in the plane's toilet)"
"Oh, Keno! This is easy."
"...and he want's to enter that garden, with a knowledge, and a mulch..."
"Don't think unnatural thoughts about your cousin, Rus."
"His name is not Papagiorgio. His name is Rusty Griswold and he's a C+ student!"
"Eddie, This is great! They don't have any of these games at the Mirage."
"It's my long-life food preservative. The FDA finally approved it!"
"Hard six coming out."
"That's nothing, it's a...birthmark."
"[Watching a belly dancer] Doesn't the blood rush to your stomach?"
"Ew, I'm all sticky! You're all red."
"My skin's soaked right through to the skin!"
"Now see what you've done with your filthy Eastern ways!"
"[Watching a man standing on his head] Doesn't the blood rush to your head, sir?"
"Scientist! You've failed Scientist!"
"Sam Motoana Phillips - Wachootoo Chief"
"Tommy Davidson- The Tiny Warrior"
"Sophie Okonedo- The Wachati Princess"
"Maynard Eziashi - Ouda"
"Bob Gunton- Burton Quinn"
"Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje- Hitu"
"Simon Callow- Vincent Cadby"
"Ian McNeice- Fulton Greenwall"
"Jim Carrey- Ace Ventura"
"The great plains of Africa, the cradle of civilization. A place where there exists a balance between nature and man. So ancient, so sacred, no man would dare to disturb it. No man but Ace Ventura."
"New Animals. New Adventures. Same Hair."
"Most people wouldn't last one minute in the real wild nature. Ace Ventura, not even a second."
"Dominique Minot – Sylvie Gaudel"
"Walter Matthau – Carson Dyle (alias Hamilton Bartholomew)"
"Audrey Hepburn – Regina "Reggie" Lampert"
"Cary Grant – Brian Cruikshank (alias Peter Joshua, Alexander Dyle, and Adam Canfield)"
"Please don't tell who did what to whom!"
"It's a guessing game of mirth and mystery!"
"You can expect the unexpected when they play..."Charade""
"Is Anyone Really Who They Seem To Be?"
"Doesn't the Eastern flavour come rather expensive?"
"[After seeing a smoking curling stone] Hey, it's a thingy! A fiendish thingy!"
"[on the phone] Hello, this is the famous Ringo."
"(regarding a broken ladder) All the rungs have been neatly sawed in the middle!"
"Get sacrificed! I don't subscribe to your religion!"
"I like operations. They give you a sense of outlook, don't they?"
"[At the man standing on his head] Is it nasty this ring?"
"Arsenio 'Sonny' Trinidad- Ashram Monk"
"I'm not even supposed to be here today."
"A very funny look at the over-the-counter culture."
"Just because they serve you doesn't mean they like you."
"Female Customer: It's important to have a job that makes a difference, boys. That's why I manually masturbate caged animals for artificial insemination."
"Jay: I feel good today, Silent Bob. We're gonna make some money, then you know what we're going to do? We're gonna go to that party, we're gonna get some pussy, and I'm gonna fuck this bitch, I'll fuck this bitch, I'll fuck anything that moves! [to a man passing by on a bicycle] Yo, what the fuck you lookin' at? I'll kick your fuckin' ass! Shit yeah. [to Silent Bob] Doesn't that motherfucker owe me 10 bucks? You know, fuckin' tonight, we're gonna rip off this fucker's head, and tear out his fuckin' soul. Remind me if he tries to buy something, I'm gonna shit in the motherfucker's bag. [to two women in a passing car] Hey, what's up babes? What's up, sluts?"
"Hey, try not to suck any dick on your way through the parking lot!"
"Bunch of savages in this town."