"[Doing taste tests with the mouse] Here you go, knock yourself out. [The mouse takes a bite of the string cheese and throws it down] No good, huh? Otis, more curry! [He gives him the next string cheese] Okay, try this one. [The mouse eats it all up] Eh? It's mozzarella and herring. You can taste the herring, right? I've also got a great idea for a caviar-brie swirl and a peanut butter and jelly-provolone for the kids. But I really want to talk about marketing. You should be our spokesperson. I know some people who have used a mouse as a spokesperson and it seemed to work out pretty well..."

"[Upon seeing the box, returned for insufficient postage] I told you, you should have weighed him."

"[holding a tiny box, addressed to Fidel Castro in Havana, Cuba] Aw... I forgot to put holes in the box! [He chuckles evilly]"

"[when Lars accidentally smacks Ernie's hand with a hammer] Are you trying to kill me?!!"

"[when Lars accidentally hits Ernie with a broom] What are you doing, ya stupid nitwit?!"

"Pop's lucky string! That son of a bitch ate it!"

"Hasta la vista, you little rat bastard!"

"I don't think we're dealing with an ordinary mouse."

"Yeah, I was on top once, too. And there's only one way to go from there, and that's down, baby! Down!"

"Is that... is that hair gel?"

"O-Lan Jones - Esmeralda"

"Dick Anthony Williams - Officer Allen"

"Caroline Aaron - Marge"

"Susan Blommaert - Tinka"

"Conchata Ferrell - Helen"

"Robert Oliveri - Kevin Boggs"

"Alan Arkin - Bill Boggs"

"Vincent Price - The Inventor"

"Kathy Baker - Joyce Monroe"

"Anthony Michael Hall - Jim"

"Dianne Wiest - Peg Boggs"

"Winona Ryder - Kim Boggs"

"Johnny Depp - Edward Scissorhands"

"Edward lived alone where he could hurt no one and no one could hurt him. Until the day the Avon Lady came calling..."

"The Director Of "Batman" & "Beetlejuice" Invites You To Meet His Newest Creation:"

"His story will touch you, even though he can't."

"Edward Was Here...."

"Innocence is what he knows. Beauty is what she sees."

"The story of an uncommonly gentle man."

"His scars run deep."

"[last words] Hey! I said, "Stay away from her!" [Enraged, Edward stabs him in the stomach and pushes him out of a window to his death]"

"Forget about holding her hand, man. Think about the damage he could do to other places."

"[to Peg] Sweetheart, you can't buy the necessities of life with cookies."

"Darn this stuff!"

"The light concealing cream goes on first. Then you blend, and blend, and blend. Blending is the secret."

"Rob Moran — Detective Stabler"

"Richard Tyson — Detective Krevoy"

"Brett Favre — himself"

"Willie Garson — Dr. Zit Face / High School Pal Bob"

"Khandi Alexander — Joanie"

"Sarah Silverman — Brenda"

"W. Earl Brown — Warren Jensen"

"Keith David — Charlie"

"Markie Post — Sheila Jensen"

"Jeffrey Tambor — Sully"

"Lee Evans — Tucker / Norm Phipps"

"Chris Elliot — Dom Woganowski"

"Ben Stiller — Ted Stroehmann"