First Quote Added
April 10, 2026
Latest Quote Added
"Captain Hook: Oh, don't rub it in. I spent more time on the song than the plan."
"Captain Hook: She's in the royal prison. Guarded by witches and knights and even worse --- the cyclops!"
"Captain Hook: Well, that plan didn't work as well as I thought..."
"King Harold: There is another."
"Artie: That was a plan?"
"Artie: Good thing you didn't say pirates. I was scared you were going to say pirates. Given how many they were just now."
"Puss in Boots: And the revolutionaries."
"Shrek: Hello?!? Is anyone here? Artie?!? Donkey?!? Hey, old man! Yeah, you! Have you seen a talking donkey around? Or a whiny teenager?"
"Artie: Are we almost there yet? It feels like we've been walking forever."
"Sleeping Beauty: (...snore...)"
"Shrek: Hey, it wasn't my quest! Next time, ask the Lady of the Lake for a shorter one!"
"Gingerbread Man: Stromboli took Pinocchio to the Evil Queen's castle! He's going to use Pinocchio to create an army of evil wooden puppets!"
"(Sleeping Beauty arrives)"
"Fiona: But where's Charming?"
"[A piano being played is heard]"
"Sleeping Beauty: And I heard them interrogating Gingy!"
"Fiona: Where's Rapunzel and the others?"
"Fiona: We have to save him!"
"Gingerbread Man: (off-screen) That doesn't scare me!"
"Knight: I don't know how you got there, but you're going to stay there. Okay... I'll unlock it this once. And, y'know, if you're not doing anything Friday... perhaps we could take in a puppet show?"
"Knight: (off-screen) Fine! Have it your way. Make it nice, steaming HOT chocolate!"
"Knight: Unlock the door for you? Of course, my sweet sleepyhead!"
"Artie: Is that a piano?"
"The Narrator: Oh, forget it."
"Sleeping Beauty: (Snores)"
"The Narrator: Ahem! Search frantically..."
"Sleeping Beauty: Fiona! Can you hear me?!?"
"The Narrator: Arthur was eager to return with Shrek to Far Far Away."
"Shrek: You did good, lad."
"Shrek: Okay. Let's go."
"Artie: Thanks. Hey, why are you wearing a dragon costume?"
"The Narrator: Ahem. As I was saying, Sleeping Beauty searched frantically..."
"The Narrator: Searched frantically because her friends' very lives depended upon her!"
"Sleeping Beauty: You don't have to be so rude. (Snores)"
"Cyclops: Get her, boys! Ooooh! That had to hurt! Aw, come on! She's just a girl! Are you going to make me come down there? Club sandwich! You guys are pathetic!"
"Prisoner: We're busting out! Whoo! Whee! We're busting out! Whoo!"
"Gingerbread Man: (off-screen) I won't tell you anything!"
"Knight: (off-screen) Oh yeah? Get me some milk!"
"Gingerbread Man: (off-screen) Nooooo!!!"
"Sleeping Beauty: Fiona!"
"Sleeping Beauty: I heard Rapunzel is with Charming now!"
"Fiona: That tramp!"
"Fiona: Hey, why don't you just eat your way out?"
"Gingerbread Man: No! That's revolting! I'm not a cannibal."
"Gingerbread Man: Girls! I'm so glad to see you! They were going to do horrible things to me! With chocolate!"
"Fiona: You're safe now. Have you seen Cinderella? Or Pinocchio?"
"Gingerbread Man: Oh, you mean the king of the stupids? He's back in the castle preparing for his big show."
"Fiona: Then what's where we're going. Right?"
"Fiona: I love her, but she'll only slow me down. Gingy, watch over her. When she wakes up, get her out of here. Ha! If those guards think a wooden door can stop me..."
"Donkey: Man, you were great! Swinging your sword, waving your shield, left-right, left-right, duck and weave! I love you, Artie! You're the man!"