"[first lines] Saturday, March 24, 1984. Shermer High School, Shermer, Illinois, 60062. Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. What we did was wrong. But we think you're crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. What do you care? And you see us as you want to see us - in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. You see us as a brain, an athlete, a basket case, a princess, and a criminal. Correct? That's the way we saw each other at 7:00 this morning. We were brainwashed."

"John Kapelos — Carl, the Janitor"

"Paul Gleason — Vice Principal Richard Vernon"

"Ally Sheedy — Allison Reynolds"

"Molly Ringwald — Claire Standish"

"Judd Nelson — John Bender"

"Anthony Michael Hall — Brian Ralph Johnson"

"Emilio Estevez — Andrew "Andy" Clark"

"[discovers that Ferris has been faking being sick and sneaking out of the house by finding a mannequin in his bed] I KNEW IT!!!"

"[on the phone after her encounter with Rooney] Look, this is not a phony phone call. There is an intruder, male, Caucasian, possibly armed, certainly weird, in my kitchen. My name's Bueller. [pause] Look, it's real nice that you hope my brother's feeling better, but I'm in danger. Okay? I'm very cute, I'm very alone, and I'm very protective of my body. I do not want it violated or killed! All right?! I need help! [pause again] Speak any English?! [hangs up] DICK HEAD!"

"[last line; in post-credits scene] [to home audience; after emerging from his bedroom] You're still here? It's over. Go home. [walks back to his bedroom; shoos audience away] Go."

"[after he barely gets back in bed, and his parents leave the room] Yep. I've said it before and I'll say it again. Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."

"Cameron has never been in love - at least, nobody's ever been in love with him. If things don't change for him, he's gonna marry the first girl he lays, and she's gonna treat him like shit, because she will have given him what he has built up in his mind as the end-all, be-all of human existence. She won't respect him, 'cause you can't respect somebody who kisses your ass. It just doesn't work."

"If anybody needs a day off it's Cameron. He's got a lotta things to sort out before he graduates. He can't be wound up this tight and go to college. His roommate'll kill him. Pardon my French, but Cameron is so uptight, if you stuck a lump of coal up his ass, in 2 weeks, you'd have a diamond."

"It's not that I condone fascism or any 'ism' for that matter. Ism's, in my opinion, are not good. A person should not believe in an 'ism,' he should believe in himself. I quote John Lennon: 'I don't believe in Beatles. I just believe in me.' A good point there. After all, he was the walrus. I could be the walrus. I'd still have to bum rides off of people."

"[after his parents have left, thinking he is ill] They bought it. Incredible! One of the worst performances of my career and they never doubted it for a second. How could I possibly be expected to handle school on a day like this? This is my ninth sick day this semester. It's getting pretty tough coming up with new illnesses. If I go for ten, I'm probably gonna have to barf up a lung, so I'd better make this one count. The key to faking out the parents is the clammy hands. It's a good non-specific symptom. I'm a big believer in it. A lot of people will tell you that a good phony fever is a dead lock, but, uh, you get a nervous mother, you could wind up in a doctor's office. That's worse than school. You fake a stomach cramp, and when you're bent over, moaning and wailing, you lick your palms. It's a little childish and stupid, but then, so is high school."

"Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. I do have a test today, that wasn't bullshit. It's on European socialism. I mean really, what's the point. I'm not European. I don't plan on being European, so who gives a crap if they're socialists. They could be fascist anarchists and it still doesn't change the fact that I don't own a car."

"Edward LeBeau - Gym Teacher"

"Kristy Swanson - Simone Adamley"

"Del Close - English Teacher"

"Ben Stein - Economics Teacher"

"Charlie Sheen - Boy in Police Station"

"Edie McClurg - Grace"

"Lyman Ward - Tom Bueller"

"Cindy Pickett - Katie Bueller"

"Jennifer Grey - Jeanie Bueller"

"Jeffrey Jones - Ed Rooney"

"Mia Sara - Sloane Peterson"

"Alan Ruck - Cameron Frye"

"Matthew Broderick - Ferris Bueller"

"Leisure Rules"

"One Man's Struggle to Take It Easy"

"Alexis Bledel - Winnie Foster"

"Elisabeth Shue - Narrator"

"Robert Luis - Night Deputy"

"Noami Kline - Beatrice Ruston"

"Julia Hart - Sally Hannaway"

"Victor Garber - Robert Foster"

"Amy Irving - Mrs. Foster"

"Scott Bairstow - Miles Tuck"

"Sissy Spacek - Mae Tuck"

"William Hurt - Angus Tuck"

"Ben Kingsley - The Man in the Yellow Suit"

"Jonathan Jackson - Jesse Tuck"