"[Fading in to a class trip to the zoo. The class stares down at a dolphin tank. Due to the humidity around the tank, the nipples of the large breasted older teacher are even more noticeably pokey than before]"

"[Deacon's parents lie in bed watching a porn video, when their own portrait shows up in the background]"

"Michael Cera - Paulie Bleeker"

"Rainn Wilson - Rollo"

"Eileen Pedde - Gerta Rauss"

"Olivia Thirlby - Leah"

"J. K. Simmons - Mac MacGuff"

"Allison Janney - Bren MacGuff"

"Jason Bateman - Mark Loring"

"Jennifer Garner - Vanessa Loring"

"Elliot Page - Juno MacGuff"

"[repeated line] Make myself well."

"Sometimes the most unlikely people become heroes."

"They told 16-year-old Rocky Dennis he could never be like everyone else. So he was determined to be better."

"Evelyn: [repeated line] Florence."

"Gar: [realizing Rusty is having a nervous breakdown on the phone] What? Rusty? Ah, shit! [hangs up the phone and leaves the auto garage] It's Rusty."

"[spending a day with his biker "family" at an amusement park] Hey, Ben, look at this. [he's looking in a funhouse mirror that instead of distorting his face, makes it look like everyone else's]"

"[poem] These things are good: ice cream and cake, a ride on a Harley, seeing monkeys on a tree, the rain on my tongue, and the sun shining on my face. These things are a drag: dust in my hair, holes in my shoes, no money in my pocket, and the sun shining on my face."

"[to some students who make fun of his face] Hey, what's the matter? Haven't you guys ever seen anybody from the planet Vultern before? Beep-beep-beep! Beep-beep-beep!"

"Don't worry, Mr. Simms. I look weird, but otherwise I'm real normal. Everything will be cool. Thanks a lot. See you next week."

"[her final line, after finding out that Rocky has passed away in his sleep and she re-tacks his map of Europe] Now you can go anywhere you want, baby."

"[to the doctor who insisted speaking to Rusty] You know, for 12 years, I've been listening to you guys' bullshit. First you told me that he was gonna be retarded, then you told me that he was gonna be blind and deaf. If I dug his grave every time one of you geniuses told me he was gonna die, I would be eating fuckin' chop suey in China by now! Anything else?"

"[asked about where is Rocky's true father] Why do you try and call the Pope while you're at it? At least he would be easier to reach."

"[first line] And he is testing us! Every, every day, our Lord is testing us. If he wasn't testing us, how would you account for the sorry state of our society? For the crimes that plague the big cities of this country? When he could sweep this pestilence from the face of the earth with one mighty gesture of his hand. If our Lord wasn't testing us, how would you account for the proliferation these days of this obscene rock and roll music, with its gospel of easy sexuality and relaxed morality? If our Lord wasn't testing us, why, he could take all these pornographic books and albums, and turn them into one big fiery cinder like that! But how would that make us stronger for him? One of these days, my Lord is gonna come to me and ask me for an explanation for the lives of each and every one of you. And what am I gonna tell him on that day? That I was busy? That I was tired? That I was bored?! No!! I can never let up! I welcome his test! I welcome this challenge from my Lord so that one day I can deliver all of you unto his hands, and when that day dawns, I don't wanna have to do any explaining! I don't want to be missing from your lives!"

"Jim Youngs - Chuck Cranston"

"Frances Lee McCain - Ethel McCormack"

"Sarah Jessica Parker - Rusty"

"Christopher Penn - Willard Hewitt"

"Dianne Wiest - Vi Moore"

"John Lithgow - Reverend Shaw Moore"

"Lori Singer - Ariel Moore"

"Kevin Bacon - Ren McCormack"

"He's a big-city kid in a small town. They said he'd never win. He knew he had to."

"The music is on his side."

"[last line] Hey, hey. What's this I see? I thought this was a party! Let's dance!!"

"All he wanted to do was dance."

"One kid. One town. One chance."

"I'm standing up here before you today with a very troubled heart. You see, my friends, I've always insisted on taking responsibility for your lives. But, I'm really like a first-time parent who makes mistakes and tries to learn from them. And like that parent I find myself at that moment when I have to decide. Do I hold on, or do I trust you to yourselves? Let go and hope that you've understood at least some of my lessons. If we don't start trusting our children how will they ever become trustworthy? I'm told that the senior class at the high school has got use of the warehouse in Bayson for the purpose of putting on a senior dance. Please join me to pray to the Lord... to guide them in their endeavors."

"[addresses the town council and reads from his notes in the Bible] "From the oldest of times, people danced for a number of reasons. They danced in prayer... or so that their crops would be plentiful... or so their hunt would be good. And they danced to stay physically fit... and show their community spirit. And they danced to celebrate." And that is the dancing we're talking about. Aren't we told in Psalm 149 "Praise ye the Lord. Sing unto the Lord a new song. Let them praise His name in the dance"? And it was King David - King David, who we read about in Samuel - and what did David do? What did David do? What did David do? [reads again] "David danced before the Lord with all his might... leaping and dancing before the Lord." Leaping and dancing. Ecclesiastes assures us... that there is a time for every purpose under heaven. A time to laugh... and a time to weep. A time to mourn... and there is a time to dance. And there was a time for this law, but not anymore. See, this is our time to dance. It is our way of celebrating life. It's the way it was in the beginning. It's the way it's always been. It's the way it should be now."