Homestar Runner

"Coach Z: Aaah... I'm getting too old for hijinks. And the last time I attempted even medium jinks, I t'rew out my torn rubdominal scrimmage."

"Commercial narrator: If you've suffered a torn rubdominal scrimmage, Halloween jinx don't need to be a thing of the past."

"Night Watchman Coach Z: Slow night at City Hall, eh, fellow night watchman?"

"Night Watchman Bubs: That establishes our location and humdrum routine."

"Night Watchman Bubs: When we rushed in here, the mysterious silhouette had vanished."

"Teenage Strong Bad Oh, great. Another fanatical mysterious believer."

"Storybook Homestar Runner: Oh no! I gave up the ghost!"

"Storybook Strong Sad: You'll stay that way unless you enter the spooky woods and face your 3 fears before the witching hour!"

"Storybook Homestar Runner: I, gulp, guess, gulpo, I'm on, gulpamundo, my own, Gulp Fantasy 2000."

"Strong Bad: [narrating] Tedioused The Homestar Runner at great risk to the listenability of the story."

"Strong Bad: [narrating] Repeated Strong Bad, flirting with oversaturating the market with his new phrase too soon."

"Storybook Homestar Runner: OH NO!! My final fear!! A half-decomposed raccoon being carried around by a family of wet pigeons!! [cut to a disgustingly detailed illustration of just that]"

"Storybook Homestar Runner: Awww, but look. The gross wet pigeons think Strong Bad's ping-pong ball is an egg! They're gonna hatch it! They were just as gulp of me, as I was gulp of them!"

"Strong Bad: [narrating] Said the Homestar Runner, really shoe-horning some kind of half-baked moral into this thing."

"Strong Mad: UH... WIZARD OF OZ!!"

"Strong Bad: Yeah, nope, wrong album there too."

"Marzipan: Hey, where's your hat, Homestar?"

"Homestar Runner: : I'm sorry, I couldn't understand what you just said."

"Marzipan: [sighs] I mean, where your hat is at, Homestar?"

"Coach Z: Well, it's like I always say. A man's uniform is like a temple, wherein he keeps his… uniform when he's not using it."

"Coach Z: No, I'm suggesting that—"

"Homestar Runner: Well good, 'cause I already looked and it's not there."

"Umpire: Yeah, you're suspended from the league."

"Homestar Runner: Umm... okay! Once, there was this green gobliiiin... and um, he used to... look aroooound... And um, I guess he did a daaance. Oh man, that was terrible."

"[the wood for Strong Bad’s bonfire isn’t lighting]"

"Homestar Runner: Uh-oh. You didn't get it from behind the gazebo, did you?"

"Coach Z: Strong Bad! Strong Bad, wake up!"

"Strong Bad: Ah graibes... ...Blackthorne... bougleibes..."

"Strong Bad: Wait, the who?"

"Coach Z: I mean the pyorple!—"

"Strong Bad: Man, fisheye lens, I bet you could make even lame stuff look cool!"

"Coach Z: Yeah, yeah!"

"Coach Z: Oh, look at how cool those papes look! How about a pair of tan paaaaants?!"

"Strong Bad: Ooooh! Somebody say country dish towel?!"

"Strong Sad: No, it's a quote from Saddy Dumpington, the legendary folk hero I made up."

"Coach Z: Sounds kinda like a terlet [sic] if ya ask me."

"Homestar Runner: Hey, Pom Pom, I really like your Twinkie the Kid ate too many Twinkies as a kid costume!"

"King of Town: More like, I hanker for a hunka cheese council propaganda!"

"Homestar Runner: Ahem... It's just a fwesh wound."

"Strong Bad: Did you say "Fresh wound"?"

"Strong Bad: Yeah, that's not the right quote, “it's just a flesh wound”."

"Homestar Runner: Yeah yeah, that's what I said,”fwesh wound”"

"Strong Bad: No, just say the expression! "In the flesh"."

"Homestar Runner: Okay. In person."

"King of Town: Wilford Brimley was the Quaker Oats guy!"

"Strong Bad: Yeah, but he didn't dress like a Quaker, he just was like, the pitchman, standing in a kitchen, making breakfast."

"Homestar Runner: What are you talking about? We stand around in the snow dressed in Decemberween-themed costumes every year. It's our thing! It's what we do!"

"Strong Bad: Are you sure? I think we may have gotten our... "weens" crossed."

"[Strong Bad is “smoking”, loudly]"

"Strong Bad: Homestar, did you ramble on so long that you forgot what you were gonna show me?"