"I mean, what if it's just a goofy looking fish? You know, like a dork fish. You know? He'd be out in that desert like, "[in stupid voice] Oh, this ain't the ocean! Whoo, I better find me some water! [guffaws]" Can you imagine if you were fishing and you caught a dork fish? Because you know your friends are like, "Hey, man... what kind of fish is that?" And you'd be like, "Oh... nothing." Because you know that fish'll stick his head out of that bucket... "I'M A DORK FISH! He caught me on a corn dog! I swear to God! I was swimming underneath the ocean, and I said, 'What's a corn dog doin' underneath the ocean?!' But, boy, you know me, I love them dang corn dogs, boy! Whoo!""

"Easy, Seabiscuit."

"The Chinese have a new space program, now. It's not like the American Space Program because in the Chinese Space Program Tang... is one of the astronauts."

"William Shatner as Himself"

"Mos Def as Lazy Boy"

"Drena De Niro as Annie"

"Rene Russo as Chase Renzi"

"Pedro Damián as Cesar Vargas"

"[addressing schoolchildren as part of a show and tell on police officers] Being a policeman is not what you see on TV. I've never had to pick between the red and blue wires. Never seen a police car flip and cause other cars to burst into flames. Never had to jump across rooftops. I investigate crimes, track leads and sit in court. It's difficult, tedious work, and you won't get rich. But I've done it for years. I'm a detective. That's what I do. If you break the law, I'll do all I can to hunt you down and put you behind bars. I won't say that I succeed every time. But I try to make sure that if you do the crime, you'll do time. Any questions?"

"[before confessional camera] Do you feel lucky, punk? Well, do you? I'm too old for this shit. Go on, I dare you."

"Robert De Niro as Detective Mitch Preston"

"Eddie Murphy as Officer Trey Sellars"

"Can two plumbers save the world from going down the drain?"

"This ain't no game!"

"[when de-evolving Toad] See you later, alligator!"

"I'll kill that plumber!!!"

"[after turning Scapelli into a chimpanzee] Monkey!"

"Dakin Matthews - Mr. Seymour"

"Raynor Scheine - Curtis Burch"

"Arnold Stang - Mr. Cohen"

"[on Dinohattan] Look at this place. Pathetic! It gets worse everyday. The humans on the other side have a world full of resources. Ready for the taking. Imagine, an endless supply of food, clean air, water. And what are we stuck with? This... pithole of germs everywhere, fungus! 65 million years, we've been exiled here after the meteorite struck! While mammals roam free in the other dimension! Well, not for long!"

"I need the rock, and the Princess Daisy. And I'll finally be able to merge our world with theirs and get rid of the mammals!"

"Omar Gooding - Stuart"

"Salim Grant - Danny Harper"

"Brooke Fontaine - Amanda Hopper"

"Denise Nicholas - Joan"

"Ian Bannen - Sir Edith"

"Bill Cosby - Elliot Hopper"

"Christine Ebersole - Carol"

"Kimberly Russell - Diane Hopper"

"Barry Corbin - Mr. Emery Collins"

"Dana Ashbrook - Tony Ricker"

"Additional voices by Rachael Harris"

"Ronobir Lahiri — Taxi driver"

"Maria Bamford — Teacher"

"Amelia Marshall — Rita Powell"

"Angelo Massagli — Wallace"

"Jim Doughan — Soccer coach"

"Kevin Olson — Irwin"

"Brad Garrett — Rob"

"Jonathan Lipnicki — George Little"

"James Woods — Voice of Falcon"

"Hugh Laurie — Frederick Little"

"Steve Zahn — Voice of Monty"

"Melanie Griffith — Voice of Margalo"

"Nathan Lane — Voice of Snowbell"

"Anna and Ashley Hoelck — Martha Little"

"Geena Davis — Eleanor Little"

"Hey, George, you wanna take a break for a while? I brought my PS2."

"Now will you tell me what's going on?"