Gex Series

"Half-man, half-dog, one hundred percent sexy."

"Half-man, half-dog next springer!"

"Dog-headed gods and the women who love them, on the next Jerry Springer!"

"I'll kidnap all the oceans of the world, Underdog!"

"This place is drier than Linda Tripp's sauna pants!"

"Uh, is this one of those pyramid schemes?"

"(imitating Liberace) I wish my brother Moses was here!"

"(in a childish voice) I'm a bad man, I have poopy pants."

"If I get to meet Yul Brynner, I'll plotz!"

"I feel like an usher at a gay rodeo."

"I feel like I'm back at '54."

"(At phone) Hi pizza guy. One large pie with dung beetles."

"(At phone) Just dial 10-10-LETMYPEOPLEGO."

"(At phone) Huh, Doctor Who must have left this behind."

"(At phone) That's it, I'm calling the cops!"

"You're the only one, Gex."

"HOGAN!!! Forty days in the cooler!"

"INCOMIIIING!!!"

"The Pentagon spent 25 million dollars for this one level??"

"Note to self: Don't get killed in big, loud war."

"If this was the '60s, I'd run and hide. Of course, I'd have sideburns and bell-bottoms."

"Sur-prise, sur-prise, sur-prise."

"(as R. Lee Ermey) Where are you from, son?...Texas!!?...HO-LY--!"

"(again, as R. Lee Ermey) The first word out of your filthy sewer will be "GEX"!"

"Gooood morniiing, Menlo Park!"

"Do these boots come in red?"

"(Imitating John Belushi) I'm a Zit! Get it?"

"I am Judah Ben-Gex."

"I... am... Gexacus!"

"Look at the little soldier."

"Is it columns or pillars? It's all Greek to me."

"Hey, good thing I brought some bean-os"

"Toga, toga, TOGA, TOGA!"

"Howdy! There's some doodie."

"If I'm lucky, I'll stumble into an orgy."

"Hey... are you guys playing cards?"

"I can tickle?!"

"(with a Mexican accent) I could use a siesta!"

"I get sea sick... hold the game still!"

"There's GOLD in them there teeth!"

"Rollin' rollin' rollin', rawhide!"

"Boxcar Willie is my favorite hobo."

"YEE-HAW, LITTLE DOGGIES!"

"Saddle up, Hombre."

"Xtra, I'm a-fixin to rescue you."

"I'm going to find Billy Crystal's smile."

"Well, little lady....it's me and a donkey."

"I'm sorry, it must've been the beans."

"I'm-a fixin' to KILL you."

"(again, as Eastwood): Gecko's gotta know his limitations."