First Quote Added
April 10, 2026
Latest Quote Added
"[robot voice] I hate your face!"
"I want to get you a black cobra just to go around the neck..."
"You would if you had robot ears."
"It's the future of gaming."
"Does it scare you, Kain?"
"But underneath this genius...I'm simply a human. You know. But I'm working on that."
"How can he see me?"
"Oh, yeah... Careful is my middle name, heh. Actually, it's not, it's Philip. [sobs]"
"[robot voice] Adiós, turd nuggets."
"I love my turtle."
"Hello? ...Cool. I hope it's a naked dude with a boner."
"Fruitcup? Nice. Way to go, Mom!"
"Who wants to know what Jackie Gleason's balls tasted like? Yes, cornbread."
"Who wants to hear about my blowjob from the World War? Yeah... [news anchor voice] "A little Hiroshima on my balls.""
"Let's fucking rage!"
"Hey Samantha, don't take the red pill!"
"Dude, we were just kidding, JP. [mimicking JP's Robot voice] Don't be mad at us!"
"Okay, so who wants to hear about my STD from the silent film era? Yeah, put your hands up for that one. This chick's pussy smelled like the Great Depression."
"Do you have bathrooms here or do I have to shit in a plant?"
"Dude, jerking off on my mom is one thing, but doing your grandmother and her two roommates? That's like, legendary!"
"That's cool...if you wanna be sober and vomit."
"What does "high score" mean? "New high score." Is that bad? What does that mean? Did I break it?"
"Let's do it. The levels, I mean, not sex."
"[Mimicking J.P.] My name is JP. I am a robot. I like robots. I have a robot vagina."
"[To JP as he passes by] Hey look, it's Bono's brother!"
"Your shit's weak! Shit's weak! Wizzeak!"
"Oh, I started a fight club."
"Wassup, Silver Fox?"
"I have to pee out of my ass."
"Nice karma, Guy-Blow."
"That's great, Bobby, but we don't have Dance Dance Revolution, so, you're dumb."
"[sigh] I shoulda' worn a condom."
"You're dead to me, over."
"What's up, Douche Bigalow?"
"What's goin' on, shitlips?"
"Hi, I'm Jeff. I have a bush too. it's not grey."
"Line up, you fuckin' nerds. Who wants a shot at the champ?!"
"I'll run over your attitude. It sucks."
"My roommates said they'd get me rims for christmas. And a CB Radio so I can talk to other car beds."
"You were a dirty old whore."
"I can't believe you came on my mom. You might be the biggest perv in the world right now."
"Do you need a stuffed animal? I have a dog. I think I have a bear. Yeah, I have a bear."
"Ooh, dinner time. Oh, Fuck! Damn! Cocksucking fucker ass fuck! Ohhh! Goddamn it!"
"[while playing video game] This is like if Tyson fought an infant."
"Oh, yes! Finally, a roommate who goes shopping. Chicken cutlet, spaghetti with garlic bread, oh my God, the wings to go with the breast. I don't know what you are but I'm gonna fucking eat you, too."
"Yeah, it was my roommates, they're crazy. They tied me up. I was like one of those little calfs at the rodeo, all helpless, and you know, right when I was about to call the police, I came...and that felt nice."
"There was this fire...and I was trying to save it from this baby..."
"Don't slit your wrists, Kane. I'm here."
"Yeah, I know...west west, yo."
"I didn't wanna disturb you. You were balls deep in that turtle with a thumb in your mouth."