Comedy Films

"Machismo: Get your hand off my left tit. I'll fight you on one condition that you lower your nipples."

"What is that man doing with his hand on my Labia?"

"Get real, mum, I'm not marrying someone with bigger tits than me. He looks like a condom full of walnuts."

"You know, you're not as stupid as you look Muriel."

"Oi, oi! I'm talking to you, you rude bugger!"

"[to Sir Michael Kent]' Yo! Bullet head! Get back down there so we can finish doing the film!"

"This looks like a job for Hercules."

"Leslie Nielsen as Uncle Albert"

"Craig Bierko as Wolverine"

"Simon Rex as Human Torch"

"Pamela Anderson as the Invisible Girl"

"Regina Hall as Mrs. Xavier"

"Tracy Morgan as Professor Xavier"

"Jeffrey Tambor as Dr. Whitby"

"Brent Spiner as Dr. Strom"

"Robert Joy as Stephen Hawking"

"Ryan Hansen as Lance Landers"

"Marion Ross as Aunt Lucille"

"Kevin Hart as Trey"

"Christopher McDonald as Lou Landers/Hourglass"

"Sara Paxton as Jill Johnson"

"Drake Bell as Rick Riker/Dragonfly"

"Aah, stop you idiot!"

"Get the fire extinguisher!"

"Holy shit!"

"Get a blanket or something!"

"What are you doing?"

"Dude, you're on my gargoyle."

"How's that feel, Invisi-Bitch?!"

"Make a costume, shit-head! I swear, they're gettin' dumber and dumber every year!"

"Because he can do this!"

"We have people who can walk through walls. And we have people who think they can walk through walls!"

"Squatting on a glass table...two girls...one cup...you know what to do!"

"How do I know that baby's even mine?!"

"Yes I know... [while fainting]"

"Yes, you see, we confused you with one of our sex-change patients, but don't worry, we didn't remove your penis. We did, however, cut off your testicles, but since your wife's dead, you won't be needin' 'em!"

"No, it's not your dead wife."

"[before falling down after Albert pushed him] Shiiiit!..."

"You have an incredible ass!"

"Hey anyone want to get high? I have some hash with me. White guy in the dreads, you know what I am talking about? Can I get a what-what? Holla! I've got a stiff pole for your sweet hole. Anyone? Anyone? Pussies!"

"That's a lie. I think of suicide every single day."

"I'll drive."

"Watch where you're going in slo-mo, dipshit!"

"Don't forget about the bitches."

"And once a month you'll bleed from your vagina!"

"I can't breathe; you're kneelin' on my balls!"

"You did surgery on me?"

"Look at you, eatin' junk food, wearin' fake beards."

"With great power comes hot bitches."

"[last words, before being killed by his hourglass bomb] Oh, fuck."