"I understand why he's doin' what he's doin'. If I had to endure what he's endured—if I was eight years old and saw my father gunned down in front of my family—I'd be carryin' a gun too, and I wouldn't be wearin' a badge."

"It's good to have somebody around here who can pee standing up."

"Don't look for a happy ending. It's not an American story. It's an Irish one."

"You're a stupid man, Mr. Burke. You only see me standing between you and your money. You're forgetting about the thousand men standing behind me. That's a mistake."

"[Looking at a dilapidated boat] Here it is: the Irish Republican Navy."

"They say the word peace, but at the end of the day, all they want is surrender."

"All the same, Mr. Fitzsimmoms, if you're not confused, you don't know what's goin' on."

"[At Rebecca's tombstone.] Into paradise...may the angels...lead you."

"Jim Carrey - Adult Joe Wenteworth"

"David Strathairn - Rev. Russell"

"Oliver Platt - Ben Goodrich"

"Ashley Judd - Rebecca Wenteworth"

"Joseph Mazzello - Joe Wenteworth"

"Ian Michael Smith - Simon Birch"

"Miss Leavey: Help. Please. I'm gonna strangle him. I swear to God I'm gonna strangle that little granite mouse if it's the last thing I do."

"Rebecca Wenteworth: Do your thing, Simon! Show 'em how it's done!"

"Joe Wenteworth: [At Simon's bed in the hospital] Jesus, Simon, you look like shit."

"Joe Wenteworth: Okay, you grabbed her boobs, and you pulled her into the manger. Big deal. It could've happened to anybody. Well, maybe not anybody."

"Winter left its icy chill behind and soon it was spring, then summer again. Grandmother passed away that June following a stroke. And because Hilde was always so content to just follow her lead...she had a stroke of her own and died in July. We buried them side by side. It's the way they would've wanted it. Ben Goodrich legally adopted me just two days before my thirteenth birthday. Not a day goes by that I don't thank God for bringing him into my life. With Simon's help, I had finally found my real father."

"Time is a monster that cannot be reasoned with. It responds like a snail to our impatience...then it races like a gazelle when you can't catch your breath."

"When someone you love dies, you don't lose them all at once. You lose them in pieces over time, like how the mail stops coming. What I remember most to this day was my mother's scent and how I hated it when it began to disappear. First from her closets and drawers, then from her dresses that she had sewed herself and finally, from her bedsheets and pillowcases."

"Simon's father owned the Birch Granite Company. Mr. Birch was a big believer in the rock and just about everything in their house was made from granite, including Mr. Birch."

"[At the birth scene of Simon Birch.] Simon Birch was the smallest delivery ever recorded in the history of Gravestown Memorial Hospital."

"Our Sunday school teacher was an unhappy woman by the name of Miss Leavey. Her name suited her perfectly as she was always leaving class."

"[Visiting Simon's grave.] I am doomed to remember a boy with a wrecked voice, not because of his voice or because he was the smallest person I ever knew, or even because he was the instrument of my mother's death but because he is the reason I believe in God. What faith I have, I owe it to Simon Birch, a boy I grew up with in Gravestown, Maine. It is Simon who had me a believer."

"[on the bus that plunged into a lake] Stop it! [Everyone looks around] I'm not going to let anything happen to any of you, understand?"

"To destroy your enemy, you must find him, face him, and then... become him."

"Dominique Swain – Jamie Archer"

"Gina Gershon – Sasha Hassler"

"Alessandro Nivola – Pollux Troy"

"Joan Allen – Dr. Eve Archer"

"Nicolas Cage – Castor Troy/Sean Archer"

"John Travolta – Sean Archer/Castor Troy"

"Only one will survive."

"It's like looking in a mirror - only not."

"In order to catch him, he must become him."

"DJ: That's Frieda, our maid. Personally I think she was Hitler's maid at Berchtesgaden."

"Gaby Hoffman — Lane"

"Lukas Haas — Scotty"

"Natalie Portman — Laura"

"Tim Roth — Charles Ferry"

"Natasha Lyonne — DJ"

"Alan Alda — Bob"

"Drew Barrymore — Skylar Dandridge"

"Edward Norton — Holden Spence"

"Julia Roberts — Von"

"Goldie Hawn - Steffi"