"Ella's Mother: [to young Ella] I want to tell you a secret that will see you through all the trials that life can offer. Have courage, and be kind. Ella, you have more kindness in your little finger than most people possess in their whole body... Where there is kindness, there is goodness. And where there is goodness, there is magic."

"And so Kit and Ella were married. And I can tell you, as her fairy godmother, that they were counted to be the fairest and kindest rulers the kingdom had known. And Ella continued to see the world not as it is, but as it could be, if only you believe in courage, and kindness, and occasionally, just a little bit... of magic."

"Forgiven or not, Cinderella's stepmother and her daughters would soon leave with the Grand Duke, and never set foot in the kingdom again."

"[after transforming into her true form] That's better."

"I'm your Hairy Dogfather. I mean, Fairy Godmother!"

"I think we might have made a bargain: A ball for the people, and a princess for the prince."

"How many divisions will this "good, honest country girl" provide us? How will she make the kingdom stronger? We are a small kingdom amongst great states, Your Royal Highness. And it's a dangerous world."

"I was having a fine old time. You had to go and choose that one, didn't you?"

"It's beyond my wit, Your Majesty, but I wouldn't mind a bit of a jolly."

"A ragged servant that's what you are and what you will always be."

"[to Cinderella, after she and Drizella tear Cinderella's mother's dress] You shall not go to the ball!"

"What sweet singing. Makes me want to tarry just a little."

"Even if she does not want to be found, I have to see her again."

"My name is Kit, my dad calls me that when he's in a good mood."

"[to Lady Tremaine, after having her foot encased in the glass slipper] I forgive you."

"[singing] If you see everywhere blooming blue lavender…"

"[to Prince "Kit" Charming] Just because it's what's done doesn't mean it's what should be done."

"Brendan Fraser as Dan Sanders"

"Angela Kinsey as Felder, Neil’s assistant"

"Ken Jeong as Neil Lyman, Dan’s evil boss"

"Matt Prokop as Tyler Sanders, Dan & Tammy’s son"

"Brooke Shields as Tammy Sanders, Dan’s wife"

"Satara Silver as Cosmetics Sales Clerk"

"Ben Falcone as Tommy"

"Jonathan Banks as Paolo Gordon"

"Ellie Kemper as Flo"

"Eric Stonestreet as Big Chuck"

"Robert Patrick as Skiptracer"

"John Cho as Daniel Casey"

"Morris Chestnut as Detective Reilly"

"T.I. as Julian"

"Génesis Rodríguez as Marisol"

"Amanda Peet as Trish Patterson"

"Jon Favreau as Harold Cornish"

"Melissa McCarthy as Diana / Dawn Budgie"

"Jason Bateman as Sandy Bigelow Patterson"

"She's having the time of his life"

"Is this the face of a sucker?"

"Is this the face of a thief?"

"Dawn Budgie... That's a terrible fucking name."

"You looking for these? You're not gonna find them, stupid. See ya, Sandy!"

"Friends don't steal friends' identities, do they?"

"Dick Van Dyke as Mr. Martin"

"Alice Drummond as Mrs. Martin"