"A quarter cup of lemon juice, half a cup of salt and a loofah sponge. Scrub scrub scrub."

"You saved... my shoe. M-my life."

"You smell like sweet red plums and grilled cheese sandwiches."

"What I'm thinking involves a machete and a pair of pliers."

"Are you aware that Fran has chosen teal for her bridesmaids? Teal, the color of gangrene. ... Oh, oh, and I Honestly …"

"You are exquisite. You're timeless. And you have the love of a man named Steve. A man who, while you were away having…"

"I had to go through your wallet to get your identification. And you know what I must say, I've ever met anyone who al…"

"Oh, of course. Krazy Glue. Why didn't I bring the Krazy Glue, in case his pecker fell off?"

"Geri: Pierre, I love you, but if you use another carnation in my bouquet I will deport you. Muah."

"Earwax. 'X' on a triple letter, 'A' on a double word. Seventy-two points."