"Randy Quaid - Peter Blunt"

"Dan Aykroyd - Captain Tom Everett"

"Chevy Chase - Ty Webb"

"Golf, golf... what kinda name is "golf" anyway? Sounds like a sound you make when you've got something caught in your…"

"You know I'm always shooting myself with one of those poison-dipped, crossbow darts. I don't know why they don't put …"

"We're talking mucho dinero, and probably some American money too."

"Well, you certainly made it very clear how your legal system works Mr. Young. Now, I'd like to explain a little bit a…"

"[on the phone, after Chandler Young has gotten Hartounian Construction's power turned off] That's hard to say, huh? W…"

"I won't be a caddy all my life, I'm going to carwash school in the fall."

"Robert Stack - Chandler Young"