"I believe that there are things which humanity will never fully understand, for in the understanding of them, we will no longer be "human." One of these things is the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser. I don't know how it works, and I don't want to know. It's a big universe and even with our limited understanding of it, it's pretty clear that the universe is in no way equipped to keep up with the bureaucracy of its particles and/or strings. There are things lurking in the dark, unwatched, unguarded recesses of reality. Things as beyond you or I as we are beyond an amoeba. It is quite obvious that Mr. Clean Magic Erasers draw their power from these unknowable horrors. They probably found it in the core of a meteor still half buried in the Earth, hideously pulsing with a light not unlike the color of blood and hate. So use your Magic Erasers while you still can, before they run out of meteor or they discover it causes cervical cancer or testicular cancer in men and women respectively."
Quote Details
Added by wikiquote-import-bot
Unverified quote
0 likes
Original Language: English
Available Languages (1)
Sources
Imported from EN Wikiquote
https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Brian_Clevinger
Revision History
No revisions have been submitted for this quote.
Categories
Brian Clevinger
30 quotes on TrueQuotesView all quotes by Brian Clevinger →
Related Quotes
"[...]is there a contest between developers to see who can make the most irresistable game for Brian? I'm trying to ge…"
"Anyone got a few million they wanna invest?"
"(after describing all the negligent drivers he encountered that day)"So let's hope I was a quantum magnet for all bad…"
"I have, quite possibly, the most self-antagonistic brain of our generation. So when I really want to work on somethin…"
"Typing up a detailed news post at this moment would not further the goals of my great society. Stay tuned for ideolog…"
"As you may have noticed, a hurricane didn't kill me yesterday. I will celebrate my continued life with some ice cream…"
"This is the part where I tell you guys that my first car was a Corvette that I got for, like, half price or something…"
"Sorry about the delay. We were having unholy connection problems of the damned. But things seem to be working fine now."
"If you travel, do it smart. I need as many of you alive to buy as many things as possible. It's a cycle, you see, sha…"
"X-Men Legends 2, it would be so much easier to enjoy you if your characters would ever shut up."