Webcomics

"Faye: We're doin' this we're fuckin' doin' this thing"

"Dora: And now I own your soulllll"

"Faye: Meh. Fuckin' thing's been busted for years now anyway."

"Bubbles: We have holes in our hearts. We can paper them over, and learn to live with them, but they are still there."

"Faye: I know I can't fix the hole in your heart, but I can at least be the festive tapestry next to it."

"Bubbles: And I will be the decorative halberd next to yours."

"Faye: You totally get my aesthetic."

"Faye: Is it weird to be a lil' jealous of a robot's booty?"

"Bubbles: If it makes you feel any better, your tax dollars paid for it."

"Marten: You'll do great. I know it."

"Faye: Don't say that. What if it's like showbiz and if you wish someone good luck they're doomed?"

"Marten: In that case, may you end up in prison for assaulting a priest during bankruptcy proceedings."

"Faye: I like the implication that we'll fail so hard we'll need an exorcism."

"Claire: Why do you have a detachable butt?"

"Melon: Why WOULDN'T I?"

"Melon: Arthur, can I borrow $75? My wallet was in my back pocket and I doubt it will survive atmospheric re-entry."

"Arthur: Oh, your wallet didn't end up in space. I saw the leopard seal eat it. That's why those marine biologists were yelling at us."

"Clinton: I spend a lot of time trying to navigate my basic caveman impulses."

"Purple-Haired Girl: Me too. I'm constantly fighting the urge to bonk our cook on the head with a rock and roll his body into the river."

"Cook: I heard that! Stay away from me!"

"Renee: I only have second-hand info, but that's never stopped me before!"

"Renee: I did not sign up to officiate some bullshit sad-sack inverse dick-measuring contest tonight."

"Clinton: It's okay, Claire. It was my fault. He's stronger than he looks."

"Claire: He looks pretty frickin' strong! What do you do for fun, tear hockey pucks in half?!"

"Elliot: Not since high school..."

"Renee: I love it when dudes accidentally flirt with each other."

"Claire: It's like seeing a unicorn"

"Elliot: One time at the gym I accidentally dropped a 45 pound plate and it rolled right through a plate glass window."

"Bubbles: One time I accidentally pulled the bumper off of a Humvee."

"Faye: I'm glad you two are hittin' it off."

"Faye: No roughin' up the customers unless they don't pay, Bubs."

"May: Are you telling me that bus full of soccer players isn't gonna bang that limousine full of models?"

"Momo: That was a traffic accident!"

"May: They were pouring champagne on each other!"

"Renee: I wanna see you happy, that's all!"

"Elliot: But what about you? You should be happy too..."

"Renee: Pff, I'm fine. See that guy at the bar? He's been checking me out all night. I could probably go bang him in the bathroom right now if I wanted."

"Elliot: I am speaking in both my personal and professional capacity when I ask you to please not have sex in the bathrooms here."

"Iris: This is why I like selling humanoid bodies. You get hugs!"

"Dora: Guess Pintsize won't be able to push you around anymore, huh."

"Winslow: Oh, I hadn't thought about it! ...That's a lie. I totally thought about it."

"Dora: I almost feel bad for him. He's running out of targets to pester."

"Hannelore: I think Faye tolerates it more as a courtesy these days."

"Winslow: I didn't know pigeons liked habanero nachos."

"May: Normal ones don't. These are my special spicy buddies, and one day they'll conquer the rest of their idiot species."

"Renee: I wish I believed in Jesus so he could see how hard I'm trying to be good right now."

"Faye: Man, I'm jealous of y'all not havin' pinky toes. I'm constantly stubbin' mine on shit."

"Roko: I never would've guessed Bubbles was the brains of this operation."

"Faye: She's also the brawn. I'm just the sparkling personality."

"Bubbles: It is true. I do not sparkle."