Game Shows

"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Bennetttheeconomysinahellofamess, and their son Gordon Brown.""

"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr & Mrs Holders, and their children Sonny and Cher Holders.""

"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Coulddoabetterjobaschancellor, and their three-year-old son Tommy Coulddoabetterjobaschancellor""

"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr & Mrs Inacardboardboxnow, and their daughter Olive Inacardboardboxnow""

"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Millionquid, whose son hasn't come with them, because Arthur Millionquid doesn't go very far these days!""

"Phill Jupitus: "The financially irresponsible family from Ireland, the O'Verdrawns""

"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr & Mrs Esticproduct, and their chubby son Dominic, better known as the Gross Dom Esticproduct""

"Barry Cryer: "All the way from China, Mr & Mrs Ming-Slang, and their son Rai Ming-Slang. He's a banker...""

"Graeme Garden: "Will you welcome please, Mr & Mrs Seekersallowance, and their son, Job.""

"Stephen Fry: "And from Wales, Mr & Mrs Aneye, and their son, Ifor Aneye.""

"Barry Cryer: "From Germany, Herr and Frau Upthyloins, and their son, Gert.""

"Graeme Garden: "Will you welcome, please, Mr & Mrs Bennetthesonlygoneandpartedtheredsea, and their son, Gordon Bennetthesonlygoneandpartedtheredsea.""

"Stephen Fry: "Mr & Mrs Gravenimageshaltthouworship, and their daughter, Nora Gravenimageshaltthouworship.""

"Barry Cryer: "Paul McCartney carrying a hive - containing his Macca bees.""

"Graeme Garden: "Will you welcome, please, Mr & Mrs Ismaywashpot, and their son, Moab Ismaywashpot.""

"Barry Cryer: "Welcome, please, Ruth from The Archers, and her husband - 'Noooo-ah!'""

"Stephen Fry: "And Mr & Mrs Tine, and their daughter, Phyllis.""

"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Will you welcome please, Mr & Mrs Wallscametumblingdown, and their son, Andy.""

"Graeme Garden: "Will you welcome, please, Sam Lilah, and Sam's son, Andy Lilah.""

"Stephen Fry: "Please welcome Mr & Mrs Babel, and their daughter, Tara Babel.""

"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr & Mrs, will you welcome please, Mr & Mrs Calf, and their overweight son, Ted. That's right, the fat Ted Calf.""

"Barry Cryer: "Mr & Mrs Thebeginning, and their son, Ian.""

"Graeme Garden: "Will you welcome, please, Mr & Mrs Mandments, and their son, Tinker Mandments.""

"Barry Cryer: "All the proceeds from tonight's ball are going to a refuge for battered fish""

"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Bennettlookatthesizeofthatcrab, and their son, Gordon Bennettlookatthesizeofthatcrab""

"Rob Brydon: "Mr & Mrs Tine, and their exceptionally tall son, long Gus""

"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr & Mrs Triceel, and their son, Alec Triceel""

"Rob Brydon: "Mr & Mrs Mer, and their daughter, Freda""

"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "There's Noah with a big boat load of carp - he's the carp ark attendant""

"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Twiteshark, and their son, Gray Twiteshark""

"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr & Mrs Atthesizeofthisone, and their son Luke""

"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Bigguns-Lately, and their son, Courtney Bigguns-Lately""

"Rob Brydon: "Mr & Mrs Codfingers, and their young son, Chris P. Codfingers""

"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr & Mrs Forcatchingshrimps, and their daughter, Annette""

"Barry Cryer: "Mr & Mrs Otts, and their daughter, Maggie, known to us all as Mag Otts""

"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Kleinensinker, and their son, Hugh Kleinensinker""

"Fred MacAulay: "Delightful to see the Housemuirs, and their son, Stan... and the Sideacademys, and their son, Kelvin""

"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Bennetthowmuchlongeristhiswomenscurlinggoingonfor, and their son, Gordon Bennetthowmuchlongeristhiswomenscurlinggoingonfor""

"Fred MacAulay: "Mr & Mrs O'Groats, and their daughter, Tracy""

"Graeme Garden: Mr & Mrs Midlothian, and their son, Arthur. Hello Arthur, Mother well?"

"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr & Mrs Dothatoryourdead, and their daughter, Donna Dothatoryourdead""

"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Demicles, and their clarinet-playing, Hamilton 'Acker' Demicles""

"Barry Cryer: "Mr & Mrs Johnbrownandqueenvictoriadid, and their daughter, Bet""

"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr & Mrs Verness, and their unpopular son, Iain - it seems that for some reason people loathe Iain""

"Fred MacAulay: "My friend Doris, and she's usually accompanied by someone from the medical profession, normally a large... oh no, it's just a wee Doc'n'Doris""

"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Baxter, and their incontinent dog, the Baxters' Cocker - Leakie""

"Barry Cryer: "Mr & Mrs Strap, and their son, Hamish - Jock was held up""

"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr & Mrs Alrightforaholidaybutyouwouldntwanttolivethere, and their son, Francis""

"Barry Cryer: "Oh no! Someone has switched round the signs on the Ladies and Gents - what a two loos low trick!""

"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Who is that hesitating in the doorway? It's Mr & Mrs Cordial's Aunt from France... come on T'Aunt Cordial""