"Cranky: I think I just spotted Eddie! Funky: I am ready, dude! Cranky: Not ready! Eddie! Funky: Not ready yet? Just say when! Cranky: Isn't there something you can do so we can communicate? (Funky does something on the control panel and the noise stops.) Funky: All right. So, let's communicate. Cranky: What did you do? Funky: Turn the engine off. Cranky: Then what's holding us up? Funky: Like... (the plane starts to fall) ...nothing."

"Cranky: [Bluster] thought we were talking about him and not the X-Ray machine, and now he's trying to weasel his way into the history book by killing all of us with his good deeds. Fat chance. Diddy: How do we make him stop? Cranky: With the cherry soda! Right there on the shelf, next to the Super-Sonic Vitapunch pack. DK: Cherry soda? Cranky: He thinks he has a fatal disease? DK: Yeah. Cranky: All we have to do is convince him that this cherry soda is some new miracle drug that will cure him. Diddy: Cherry soda's a miracle drug? Cranky: Of course not! But he'll think so and stop trying to destroy Kongo Bongo by being a hero. Besides, I've been trying to unload that stuff for ages."

"DK: Do your zombie worst! No interplanetary visitor dude mind vibe can control my mind! Cranky: No kidding! They'll never be able to find it!"

"Bluster: [after voting for himself] May I have another? Cranky: Sorry, Bluster, one vote each! That's how it works. Bluster: You mean, I get the same number of votes as him!? (points to Eddie the Yeti) And you call this a democracy!"

"Now where did they put the level I designed? Hmm... I can't seem to find it. It was called the 'Great Girder Grapple' as I remember. Oooh, I must have spent at least 3 minutes working on it. I even drew them a fancy little picture. Bah! It must have been too good for them. The kids would have refused to play their fancy 3-D levels once they'd gotten a taste of my 2-D girder action! Don't give up hope though; they might have hidden it somewhere like a priceless gem, hoping that no one will ever find it..."

""I knew they'd have to have something like this. The Kongs will be so weighed down with all the garbage they have to collect, I can't see them getting past the second level. You can view all this silly nonsense and some other stuff I don't understand by pressing START during your game"."

"[Turns red & angrily throws cap on the ground and starts jumping on it] "Oh, I know that. I'm saying this is a treasure map. X marks the spot!""

"I could defeat [K. Rool] single-handedly of course, but then you wouldn't have a game to play would you?"

""My powerful potions will give you abilities you've never dreamed of and certainly don't deserve, assuming of course you can afford my modest asking fee. Now don't you go asking me for a potion of gameplay, as even my genius can't rescue this game from its rightful destiny in the bargain bin"."

"[Turns red & angrily throws cap on the ground and starts jumping on it] "Oh! Those no-good dirty rotten low-down yellow-bellied thievin' slime-sucking salamanders!!""

"It's more fun bein' in one of these biplanes than on top of some skyscraper!"

"Just remember that we rightfully expect our expertise to be rewarded, so do collect a good haul of Banana Bunch Coins before you even think about disturbing me, won't you?"

"NO, NO, NO! Now they've insulted me! I wouldn't go to that wedding if they begged me to go!"

"They didn't invite me?! That's so unfair! What's wrong with me?! Haven't I always tried to be a good enemy to Donkey Kong??"

""Those silly stretchy arms give [Lanky] plenty of potential, but I'm sure he'll be too busy clowning around to be of much use"."

"[Turns red & angrily throws cap on the ground and starts jumping on it] "Oh, I do have a future. I do, I do"."

"This had better be good, Klump. I was a toe away from getting into the de-scaling tub for a soak!"

"It's at times like this I find that I must ask myself again and again: 'Do I really want the Crystal Coconut this badly?'"

"WAKEY-WAKEY! I can see I have my work cut out for me..."

""'Fatso', is it? I'd choose my last words more carefully if I were you"."

"The only moron present is you! Now shut your pie-hole and get your low IQ back to HQ ASAP, you M-O-R-O-N!"

""Oh, Krusha, you lunkhead. If you had two heads you'd be lonesome"."

"Klump! Didn't I say no news, no calls, no tyranny until tomorrow!? It's a bad villain day!"

"Listen, you incompetent cretin! I want to be left alone! That means nothing! No one! No interruptions!"

"NO, you knucklehead! For some reason, Donkey Kong thinks he's a pirate, so he's pirating everything that's not glued down!"

"You call this a body?! I eat pretzels fatter than this!"

"Very well, then. Da-da-da-da-da. There, I danced, I win, now GIMMIE GIMMIE GIMMIE!"

"The prize, the wish, Kongo Bongo Island is mine!"

"Tiny can also shrink in size--although I reckon that one's nothing more than a marketing gimmick and won't even be in the game!"

""The only enemies at a wedding, Klump, are the in-laws"."

"Those clueless chimps may know their way around the island up there, but no one knows the underground like King K. Rool! Left, Krusha! (The mine cart crashes.) I meant, right!"

""[Diddy is] quick, nimble and courageous but still a bit of a lightweight when compared to my fine physique. He's also got this new-fangled thing he calls a Jetbarrel, but it sounds like nothing more than a lot of hot air to me"."

"[Turns red & angrily throws cap on the ground and starts jumping on it] "This is all Bluster’s fault! That BONEHEADED BABOON always messes things up and makes us look bad!""

""Back off or I'll have to slam you"."

"Ohh... feels like I got the stuffing knocked out of me... Oh no! I did get the stuffing knocked out of me! Where's my stuffing?!"

"Just give me your Monkey Business field report, you slimy-skinned bottomfeeder!!!!"

"Krusha! The cart! After them!... Not without me, you stupid, thickheaded tadpole!!"

"So let's see what nonsense they've made up for this game, shall we? Hmm... well, I have to hand it to them. This time they've managed to come up with a decent storyline that doesn't involve the usual golden bananas. Only joking kids! This one's worse than all the previous efforts put together! I know you probably aren't expecting a best seller, but wait till you hear this load of rubbish..."

"HOW DARE YOU ENTER MY PRIVATE INNER SANCTUM WITHOUT AN INVITATION!"

"Behold! My Doomsday... paper? Hmm... must be the instructions. 'Keep your paws off my treasure. Signed--' DONKEY KONG?!"

"Bah! The lad had a couple of frames in DKC and now he thinks he's a big star!"

"Jeepin' jungleberries! How can I be an evil ruler if I can't attack the enemy in a helicopter? Oh, that's SO unfair, I HATE that..."

"Cheater, cheater, banana bread eater!"

"Klump! Krusha! Back to the mine. By the time we get there I'll have thought of some way that I can blame all of this on you two home-spun idiots!"

"Arrrrgh! This story's even worse than DKC! They're really scraping the bottom of the barrel this time!"

"No way! You chose the last contest, so I get to choose this one, and I choose the one where Donkey Kong gets beaten to a pulp!"

"I'm surrounded by fools!"

"Until then, I got a little tip for ya, DK". [DK: "Yeah? What's that?"] "GO HOME AND LET ME GET SOME SLEEP!!"

"Aliens are taking over Kongo Bongo and all anyone's doing about it is getting their hair done!"

""It's the company's fault for making you want it so much"."