"All my life, I felt like I wasn't worth anything unless I heard those words, "Good boy". But they never came. Well, he needs to know he's hurt me. He needs to feel my pain. And he needs to pay for what he did with the only thing he truly loves! I'm gonna bite his dick off."

"No, it's fine. Bella's young, and cute, and fun, so of course Jenna loves her more than me right now. And I get that."

"That is just the classic toxic relationship. I should probably talk to him. I am a therapy dog."

"You look different."

"How so? Is it my human hands?"

"— Dr. Hagen"

"Will Ferrell — Reggie"

"Randall Park — Hunter"

"— Deliliah"

"Jack De Sanz — Munchkin"

"This beer doesn't taste good, but I like how it's making me feel."

"— Shitstain"

"Police officer. (reads the offense report) "...And he disrupted the grand opening of the Wedding Palace. Then, on the chapel ruins...""

"Jabrail. Listen, don't you have any shame? Offending an orphan like this. She's got no one, except for her uncle and aunt. Twenty five."

"Coward. As they say, life is good!"

"Shurik. Sorry, I don't drink."

"There is an epidemic in the region. Total vaccinations. FMD! Sign it!"

"Long live our court, the most humane court in the world! (applauses)"

"(to Shurik) Traitor, vile mercenary... Judas! Scoundrel! How much were you paid? Untie me! A piece of garbage, sellout! Let me go! Bandit, trash, stupid, chameleon, rascal! Alcoholic! Miserable folklorist!"

"Jabrail. You've failed the high trust placed in you!"

"Edik. (resents his 1930s truck) Hey, cursed be the day I got behind the wheel of this vacuum cleaner!"

"Now I have only two ways out of this house: either I take her to the Registrar, or she takes me to the prosecutor."

"I abducted her, and I'll return her!"

"It's not a lezginka dance for you, but a twist! I show you everything from the beginning. With the toe of your right foot, you crush the cigarette butt like this... hop-hop-hop-hop-hop! The second butt... the second butt you crush with the toe of your left foot... And now you crush both butts together! Hop-hop-hop!"

"As our wonderful satirist Arkady Raikin says, a woman is a friend of human!"

"Barman. ...And when the whole flock flew south for the winter, one small but proud bird said: "Personally, I will fly right into the sun." And she began to rise higher and higher, but very soon she burned her wings and fell to the very bottom of the deepest gorge. So let's drink to the fact that none of us, no matter how high he flew, would never break away from the his team... What happened, my dear?"

"Barbeque master. ...And the princess, out of anger, hung herself on her own braid, because he accurately counted how many grains are in the bag, how many drops are in the sea and how many stars are in the sky. So let's drink to cybernetics!"

"Portier. My great grandfather said: "I desire to buy a house, but I don't have the means to do it. I have the means to buy a goat, but I don't desire it." So let us drink to our desires always meeting our possibilities."

"A toast without wine is like a wedding night without a bride."

"By the way, in the neighboring district, the groom kidnap a member of the Communist Party."

"Shurik. (in mental hospital) Сan I see the prosecutor?"

"Shurik told us this story. He collected folklore during his vacation. Maybe this story is just a legend, but, according to Shurik, it really happened in one of the mountain regions. He did not say in which one, so as not to be unfair to other regions where exactly the same story could have happened."

"Saakhov. (to Nina) I didn't expect you to come. Such a surprise for me. Excuse me, I'll change."

"Court secretary. All rise! Court is in session!"

"During his opening monologue at the ceremony, Koy said that while Oppenheimer was "based on a 721-page Pulitzer Prize-winning book about the Manhattan Project," Barbie was based on "a plastic doll with big boobies!""

"Whatever happened to she’s everything and he’s just Ken?"

"Greta Gerwig: Made a critically acclaimed, culturally profound, feminist movie about Barbie and the patriarchy that made a billion dollars at the box office. Oscar nomination goes to … Ken.”"

"My hope for the movie is that it’s an invitation for everybody to be part of the party and let go of the things that aren’t necessarily serving us as either women or men. I hope that in all of that passion, if they see it or engage with it, it can give them some of the relief that it gave other people."

"Issa Rae - President Barbie"

"- Weird Barbie"

"Helen Mirren - Narrator"

"She [Gerwig] told me that when she was growing up, her Christian family’s closest friends were observant Jews; they vacationed together and constantly tore around each other’s homes. She would also eat with them on Friday nights for Shabbat dinner, where blessings were sung in Hebrew, including over the children at the table. “I want people to feel like I did at Shabbat dinner,” she said. “I want them to get blessed.”"

"Will Ferrell - CEO of Mattel"

"Kenmaid (Portrayed by John Cena): Hi, Barbie!"

"Sasha: Men hate women and women hate women. It's the one thing we can all agree on."

"Ruth Handler: We mothers stand still so our daughters can look back to see how far they’ve come."

"Writer Barbie: Wait. I did write a book. It’s like I’ve been in a dream, where I was somehow really invested in the Zack Snyder cut of Justice League. But what you said broke me out of it."

"President Barbie: That's because they're Dreamhouses, mother... [bleep]"

"Margot Robbie - Barbie"

"It’s a f—— doll movie! It’s a doll movie. It’s a fun movie about dolls who come to life and try to interact with the real world."