Comedians From The United States

"“It's your outlook on life that counts. If you take yourself lightly and don't take yourself too seriously, pretty soon you can find the humour in our everyday lives. And sometimes it can be a lifesaver.”"

"“If everyone took personal responsibility for their animals, we wouldn’t have a lot of the animal problems that we do."

"“Everybody needs a passion. That’s what keeps life interesting. If you live without passion, you can go through life without leaving any footprints.”"

"“Kindness and consideration of somebody besides yourself keeps you feeling young.”"

"“If one has no sense of humor, one is in trouble.”"

"“Accentuate the positive, not the negative. It sounds so trite, but a lot of people will pick out something to complain about, rather than say, ‘Hey, that was great!’ It’s not hard to find great stuff if you look.”"

"I'm not looking forward to death; it's important to live while we are here. But those who have died, my mother said, now they know the secret. And someday we all will."

"Friendship takes time and energy if it’s going to work. You can luck into something great, but it doesn’t last if you don’t give it proper appreciation. Friendship can be so comfortable, but nurture it — don’t take it for granted."

"You don’t just luck into integrity. You work at it."

"When I'm driving past the place I used to work, or when I'm driving past the comedy studio where I used to take photos in exchange for classes, or when I'm driving past the yoga studio I used to clean on the weekends - it's not that far removed from me yet. I get very sentimental over things like that."

"I never want to forget that I'm doing an impossible thing. How rare is it that you get to be part of something people love? It's really special. It's a very out-of-body experience to be a part of something so huge."

"You get the initial script, and then things sort of change here and there, but the whole thing is this sort of mushy collaboration, which I love."

"There are so few times in life where you are passionate about anything. And I think that if you can find that, you should just hold on to it and protect it at all costs and just follow it, because it's so rare."

"I believe if you can have an open dialogue about anything, whether it's a book or a movie or TV show, it's this door that suddenly opens your mind to new ideas."

"I think, as an actor, you create things for your character that you think will make it more personal to you, because on the day, you want to make sure that you're truly there in the moment."

"I truly did feel that I owed it to my parents, my grandparents, to do whatever it was that I wanted, because if I wasn't happy, if I wasn't being true to myself, then I wasn't living fully. They had given up so much so that I could live at the level that so many people are just automatically born into."

"There is going to be an inescapable tension between – and I’m going to call them the oligarchy; the establishment, the monied classes, the one percent – and the rest of us and the rest of humanity. And without some strong institution like the medieval church, to intervene, people are just going to go out for themselves. And there were some economic theorists who believe that’s the best thing for society, and they cling to that."

"The Internet is a physicalization of our actual pure psychic connection to ourself and the universe, and it's becoming real ... so as we set up all these things that kind of fake our psychic connection, in terms of our wires and all [garbled] connect to computers ... now it's like it's kind of up to us to either join with it psychically and spiritually, because if not it's gonna [ __ ] eat us. (41:51)"

"The Internet is a mirror of our subconscious thoughts. (63:51)"

"I was reading a really interesting breakdown of Dune, talking about the fractal nature of the series, and about how ideas spin off ideas, and spin off ideas, and spin off ideas ... and that the second trilogy, the only way to describe it, is Muppet Babies Dune, because everybody comes back as babies."

"I would say, “Be yourself above all else.” Don’t try to be what Hollywood, your managers, your agents, friends, photographers or teachers want you to be. Be who you are. With that in mind, you will find that you will have a lot of hits and misses but you can always go home knowing who you are at the end of the day. That’s a rare thing in Hollywood. This town, though it appears it’s a dream factory and to some extent it is, produces a lot more bruised bananas than peaches, if you get my meaning."

"I never think about what another actor would do with the part. I only think about what I would like to do. In other words, I start very unconventionally. The actors that I typically don’t care for are the ones who are trying to be like other actors. I just try to be like myself. I start big and I let the director bring me down from there. I start with way too much usually. That way, the director can pair it down to the size he wants. Some actors prefer to start very, very small and let the director sort of mold them but, for me, it’s the other way around."

"I would say it comes down to having your own life outside of Hollywood. It’s really just that simple. If you only live in the Hollywood world, you will be consumed by it. It will eat you alive. When you are finally spat out you will be someone who is wrecked emotionally, personally and financially. You have to have your own life outside this business. You have to have your own things that you dig, so that when you are told, “No,” and you will be told, “No” a million times, you will be OK and come out on your feet."

"Nothing compares to getting a laugh. You have to assume it on something like voice work."

"I have a pretty good idea what is funny but if you do it twice in one day in front of a live audience. They will let you know if they like it or not."

"This problem is so much bigger than individual bad cops. There is a separate legal and political framework that shields cops from consequences, gives them special rights when defending themselves, and often trains them to fear the communities that they’re supposed to protect."

"People in the penthouse are giving too much to charity? Awesome! But they're also shaping society without our consent. Not awesome! And as long as there are people with so much money in so much power, we'll have no say. The only real solution here is making sure that they're not that rich in the first place."

"Look, I know this seems like the part where I make an impassioned argument for why immigrants are good for America. You know the hits. “This country was built on immigrants. They boost the economy. Rihanna.” That’s all true. But that is not why we have asylum. We have asylum because it is the morally right thing to do. These are people escaping murder and kidnappings and gang violence."

"We eventually transitioned out of shock and into mourning. As Muslim Americans, however, we also had to contend with fear as well. We were held responsible, as a group, for the terrorist attacks or seen as a threat. Suddenly our religion was dangerous and our American-ness called into question. The comedian Hasan Minhaj put it so well in his Netflix special, Homecoming King: On September 11, "everyone in America felt like their country was under attack," he said, but on September 12 and so many nights after that, I felt like my family's love and loyalty for this country was under attack.""

"At some point, political pragmatism has to reckon with the reality of climate change. You can’t negotiate with science. You can’t meet it halfway."

"I didn’t know that people could be bigoted even as they were smiling at you. It’s hard to understand when you see people saying that they love you, but they’re afraid of you at the same time."

"I just think it’s funny that a couple of logical tweets have made me a “conservative,” such a strong label. I don’t even know what it means to be conservative, or what a conservative is anymore. I feel like the meanings of these labels are changing. I certainly would never have called myself a conservative."

"I think everyone is born with humor, but your life can beat it out of you, sadly, or you can be lucky enough to grow up in it."

"I’m a Canadian Catholic woman, so I’m hardwired to apologize."

"Why work alone if you don’t have to? It’s all give and take. It’s all about listening to others and contributing. Even if you didn’t want to act, improv classes are great, because they teach you about conversation."

"Julia Louis-Dreyfus, as far as I was concerned, was the key to the success of the show."

"Everybody needs laughs, so the fact that I've had the opportunity to make people laugh for a living is one of the many blessings that I have received in my life."

"I was not acting. I couldn't! I thought she was funny, charming, beautiful, intelligent every single second I ever spent with her, onstage and off. Bingo! No acting required."

"There’s a certain confidence, too, I think time can give you. It’s like if you have faith in God, you have the confidence of knowing I’m just one little speck. I am just one little thing on this earth, and I don’t have to be everything."

"As a great fan of the work of Mark Twain, I was so sorry when I recently learned he was dead. My thoughts and prayers go out to the whole Twain family. Especially the wonderful Shania."

"I grew up here in Washington, D.C., back during the quaint, old-fashioned "Rule of Law" period."

"Laughter is a basic human need, along with love, and food, and an HBO subscription."

"Louis Armstrong ... was marvelous to be with. He had tremendous warmth, appeal. And I idolized him, not only for how great he was singing and playing, but for himself. ... I used to get postcards from him [from] all over the world. ... He went to every accessible place in the world."

"I don't think I ever did pick a hit song, unless it was "Sweet Leilani". ... Some of the songs that [[w:Jack Kapp|Jack [Kapp] ]] picked didn't work, but 99% of them did."

"Cole Porter, he never missed, that fellow."

"I just played Bing Crosby. ... Sometimes I had a priest's collar; sometimes I dressed some way else."

"He was the only musician who ever lived, who can't be replaced by someone."

"[Crooning] started with Vallee, Rudy Vallée, didn't it? ... I was glad to be classified [as] anything, just to be working."

"[ Frank Sinatra was] another singer, and a good one."

"My two sons, Harry and Nathaniel, my father and my father-in-law and many of my friends idolized Roberto Clemente and so did I. I called him a double superstar."