"[Ending credits rap song] I come from the land of the Irish spring, Dublin's the place where I learned my thing, from the emerald isle to your place in the hood, I'm a man of green comes to do no good, (x2) Lep in the hood comes to do no good, blunt is dope, this place is hype, there's a lassie, she's just my type, I hate to resort so soon to magic, but I haven't been laid so long it's tragic, I'm so bad, I'm good, I'll show what to do so lend an ear, don't worry little lassie you've got nothing to fear, sit with a lad who's lean and green and let me show you why I'm a love machine, come to do no good, I'm a wee green guy who's new to town, show me what you do when you get down, I'll go up and you'll go down, we'll cause a scene, you'll love the green, see upcoming rap shows, get tickets for your favorite artists, Lep in the hood come to do no good, Lep in the hood, when we're bad, we're good, from the Cliffs of Moher to your front door, you better turn out the lights and pray some more, we're gonna party through the night until the dawn, then you and I are gonna get it on, (x4) Lep in the hood come to do no good."

"Look at all these glittering goods, I've got more loot than Tiger Woods!"

"We need to change a few things. I ain't with that "save the fucking hood" bullshit, "treat your girl right", that shit is wack. All right? This label, we rap about Uzis, blowing motherfuckers' heads off. Know what I'm saying? "Smack your bitch up", "Shoot your motherfucking homeboy in the face", type shit. All right?"

"[On the phone] Hey you, you listen to me. You don't wanna fuck with me, okay? I hope you had sex last night, 'cause I'm gonna come over there and I'm gonna cut off your dick, then I'm gonna feed it to my pit, then I'm gonna burn the shit when it comes out my goddam dog's ass, you hear me? Don't fuck with me, bitch!"

"I'll take it from you, homie, you'll see, cause you know the Leprechaun is the real O.G."

"Dan Martin as Jackie Dee"

"This is the Lord's house, we ain't afraid of yo ass!"

"Warwick Davis as Leprechaun"

"[Revealing her breasts] Look upon them and know that you are forever doomed."

"The King is dead. Long live the Queen."

"Tina, get out of here. Go back! There's a big, ugly motherfucking spider! Go back! get out!"

"I am not defensive and I will shoot anyone who says I am defensive."

"[After Leprechaun becomes a giant] What did you shoot him with, steroids?"

"Man. Twenty-first century and they still can't dance."

"One more thing, if I lose any more of my men, YOUR ASS IS GRASS! [Pauses, realizing that Dr. Mittenhand's only organic parts are his head and right arm] If... if you've even got an ass!"

"Jennifer Aniston as Tory"

"Ladies and gentlemen, due to a slight solicrivilance in the stem of the wheel, the situation is thus - this table is now closed."

"Look at those tits! I wish I was a man so I could just screw myself right to the floor. And I dare you to feel that ass, Fazio. That's prime."

"[After mutating into a Spider-esque abomination] No! You can't! My work! FLIES! I need, flies! Everything will be lost. the code. I have to remember the code. Bring me flies. No! No! I must save the ship. My work!"

"[Upon seeing Kowalski's remains after Leprechaun came out of his crotch] Damn. 'Gonna take more than penicillin to fix that shit."

"[To her father, upon arrival to cabin] I am going to be miserable here. There's no swimming pool, there's no shopping malls, there's no cable. Bet you don't even have a TV. This sure ain't Beverly Hills."

"A friend with weed is a friend indeed, but a friend with gold is the best I'm told."

"Lobo Sebastian as Fontaine Rivera"

"Sai Bennett as Rose"

"[To Meredith in a lawn with activated sprinkler system] I just said I wouldn't lay a hand on you. I never said I wasn't going to kill you. [Uses sprinkler head to kill her]"

"Adam Boys as Francois"

"[Escaping an incinerating basement with The Leprechaun trapped in] I've got a limerick for you; eat a dick, ass baggins."

"Emilie Reid as Meredith"

"Bruce Blain as Ian"

"Teach Grant as Sean"

"Taylor Spreitler as Lila"

"Pepi Sonuga as Katie"

"Mary Black as Mary"

"[Pulls out a pistol and imitates John Wayne] Hold it right there, pilgrim. I'm not gonna hurt ya. Naw, I'm not gonna hurt ya. [Fires gun] The hell I'm not!"

"Garry Chalk as Hamish"

"Emilie Ullerup as Catherine"

"Ben McGregor as Andy"

"Was it as good for you as it was for me?"

"Oliver Llewellyn Jenkins as Matt"

"You may think this line is getting old, but believe me son, I want me gold!"

"Warwick Davis as Leprechaun"

"Heather McDonald as Tory Reding"

"[Talking to himself while sitting over his pot of gold] Ah! Try as they will, and try as they might, who steals me gold won't live through the night."

"[Correcting Nathan about the Leprechaun not being a bear who came into the house] Nathan, that was no fuckin' bear."

"As Shakespeare said, shit happens."

"Ken Olandt as Nathan"