Radio Personalities

"A rich compost of turkey manure and wood shavings."

"The 'jugastuff' had a baby this spring."

"How long are you supposed to leave your Karl Malone tree up?"

"I'm talking from my muff."

"It's not easy being a bivalve in today's modern world."

"We're nothing but common whores."

"I don't believe the government has a knobby."

"Is that about farting zombies?"

"Eat your way to safety!"

"He's living 'La Vida Wee-Wee'."

"They're 'fun bags' not 'feed bags!'"

"I've got a powerful thirst for some of that lactation."

"Being in love means never having to say 'giddy-up.'"

"They're from the guy who snipped my nuts."

"I could do that if they were on my butt-cheeks."

"I can't run naked; I'm always tripping."

"I'm telling you, if there were balls to be held, I held them."

"I like boob-sweat. I have some right now."

"You haven't tasted my mouth! God!"

"I'm too hot to mate."

"Hey, Dad, I'm going to reassemble this magpie carcass."

"Hello!? Stop by for coitus!"

"I like cock."

"I used to wear food briefs. They were crumby."

"You clutched my personal hair and ripped it out by the roots."

"I'm gonna have to scrape off my Dick Trickle sticker."

"I let the baby drink the butter."

"She was no breath freshener, I can tell you that right now."

"I never cry over pie."

"I hope that holds the little bastards."

"Take my prostate, please!"

"If I'm gonna poke something into it, it's not going to be my finger."

"Words can hurt, you stupid bitch."

"Hey, would you like a date? I have a hammer!?"

"Billy Dee Williams once had a one-night stand with Neil Simon."

"You're a quirky doctor aren't you? Good, because I have a sore quirky."

"Barbaro dog food is dog-gone good."

"I gotta go pinch off a norbit."

"You know, that's the first time I've ever been able to smell a website."

"I always say, "Don't let your meat loaf.""

"Life is like a bowl of old bread."

"I wasn't prepared for what Dora was explorin'."

"I'm telling you, some of them gizzards are good!"

"Don't you know who I am!? I'm Chetwar Balabafoo!"

"You make my ass hurt!"

"I'm afraid of passing out in the pit."

"The juice is guilt."

"Her and her colostomy bag look forward to spending the holidays together."

"I saw a picture of Lou Reed and David Bowie standing together and it looked like an AD for jerky."

"This baby will be born with a drinking problem."