"In a land of timeless beauty, William Wallace was a man of peace. But when a ruthless king threatened his home, and murdered the woman he loved, William Wallace was driven to war...and to win for his people something they never dreamed of having. Their own country. (from theatrical trailer)"

"His passion captivated a queen. His courage inspired a nation. His heart defied an empire."

"What gives men the will to fight hard...the passion to bleed long...the strength to die well?"

"Every man dies. Not every man really lives."

"Your heart is free. Have the courage to follow it."

"After the beheading, William Wallace's body was torn to pieces. His head was set on London Bridge, his arms and legs sent to the four corners of Britain as a warning. It did not have the effect that Longshanks planned. And I, Robert the Bruce, rode out to pay homage to the armies of the English King and accept his endorsement of my crown."

"Many years later, Edward the Longshanks, King of England, supervised the wedding of his eldest son, who would succeed him to the throne. As bride for his son, Longshanks had chosen the daughter of his rival: the King of France. It was widely whispered, that for the princess to conceive, Longshanks would have to do the honors himself. That may have been what he had in mind all along."

"I shall tell you of William Wallace. Historians from England will say I am a liar, but history is written by those who have hanged heroes. The King of Scotland had died without a son and the King of England, a cruel pagan known as Edward the Longshanks, claimed the throne of Scotland for himself. Scotland's nobles fought him, and fought each other, over the crown. So Longshanks invited them to talks of truce — no weapons, one page only. Among the farmers of that shire was Malcolm Wallace, a commoner with his own lands. He had two sons, John and William."

"The trouble with Scotland...is that it's full of Scots!"

"Someday, you will be king, at least try to act like one!"

"Bring me Wallace, alive if possible, dead ... just as good."

"I gave Mornay double his lands in Scotland, matching estates in England. Lochlan turned for... for much less."

"Not the archers. My scouts tell me their archers are miles away and no threat to us. Arrows cost money. Use up the Irish. The dead cost nothing."

"In the year of our Lord 1314, patriots of Scotland, starving and outnumbered, charged the fields of Bannockburn. They fought like warrior poets. They fought like Scotsmen. And won their freedom."

"I'm so afraid. Give me the strength to die well."

"I am William Wallace! The rest of you will be spared. Go back to England, and tell them there, that Scotland's daughters and her sons are yours no more! Tell them Scotland is free!"

"As I was saying - prior to your firefighting episode - I am... the Metatron. [Bethany stares blankly.] Don't tell me the name doesn't ring a bell. [She continues staring blankly.] You people! If there isn't a movie about it, it's not worth knowing, is it?"

"Tell a person that you're the Metatron, and they stare at you blankly. Mention something out of a Charlton Heston movie and suddenly everybody's a theology scholar! May I continue uninterrupted?"

"Alanis Morissette – God"

"Janeane Garofalo – Liz"

"George Carlin – Cardinal Glick"

"Kevin Smith – Silent Bob"

"Jason Mewes – Jay"

"Salma Hayek – Serendipity"

"Jason Lee – Azrael"

"Chris Rock – Rufus, the 13th Apostle"

"Alan Rickman – Metatron"

"Linda Fiorentino – Bethany Sloane"

"Matt Damon – Loki"

"(Last words) But l'm a fucking demon."

"Ben Affleck – Bartleby"

"Look out Below"

"Prepare Thyself."

"No pleasure, no rapture, no exquisite sin greater... than central air."

"Faith is a funny thing."

"It Can Be Hell Getting Into Heaven"

"Get "touched" by an angel."

"PA Announcer: [at St. Michael's hospital] I repeat: this is not a drill. This is the Apocalypse. Please exit the hospital in an orderly fashion. Thank you. l repeat."

"So you were an artist? Big deal. Elvis was an artist, but that didn't stop him from joining the service in time of war. That's why he's the King, and you're a schmuck."

"The whole book's gender-biased. A woman's responsible for original sin. A woman cuts Samson's coif of power. A woman asks for the head of John the Baptist. Read that book again sometime. Women are painted as bigger antagonists than the Egyptians and Romans combined. It stinks."

"Bain Boehlke - Mr. Mohra"

"Steve Park - Mike Yanagita"

"Cliff Rakerd - Officer Olson"