Inspector Morse (TV series)

"Mrs Copley-Barnes: There was a Serpent in our house, coiled around the foundation."

"Lewis: You'll never believe this, Sir. We have to visit a brewery!"

"Butler: Your name, Sir?"

"Lewis: The last shall be first and the first shall be last"

"Mrs Radford: So, Morse, must the evil that men do live on after them?"

"Morse: That's it, Lewis! You're a genius!"

"Lewis: Do you fancy a pint, Sir?"

"George: The electrics are up the chute, for a start."

"Morse: That's our man, alright!"

"Lewis: You go trampling about, don't you. You think you're so clever, but sometimes you're a bloody fool!"

"Morse: You'd better start by rolling your trouser-leg up, Lewis. DCI Bottomley is a grand master, a grander master that I."

"Lewis: (to Bottomley) Like a game of chess, do you, Sir?"

"Morse: With a man like deVries, you have to look INSIDE the coffin!"

"Hugo deVries: You're sweating, Morse. It's most disagreeable."

"Lewis: (admiring DeVries' Jaguar) Nice car!"

"Hugo deVries: I like being dead. It takes the strain out of living."

"Hugo deVries: I am Zoroastro; YOU are Monostatos!"

"Morse: Toscanini? Arturo Toscanini? That's the WORST recording of 'The Magic Flute' there's ever been! I wouldn't even let it in the house!"

"Morse: No, I don't join groups. I'm even thinking of leaving the choir."

"Morse: (to Lewis) Go and see it! You'll love it...it's got a dragon."

"Lewis: (Noticing Inspector Hillian's drinking) The way he knocks it back, it's a wonder he lived to collect an OBE."

"Constable: I was over the way ... and there was this car..."

"Morse: Well, I think I'll go for a walk. What about you?"

"Mrs Dawson: Patrick thinks you're a very good detective. A poor policeman, and a very good detective."

"Morse: Different policemen have different methods, Mrs Lapsley"

"Frederick Redpath: My name is Frederick Redpath. It has been for the last eleven years."

"Morse: Get on with it, Lewis!"

"Lewis: I think you could have let her win the chess, Sir."

"Lewis: That badge of yours. Why did you keep it?"

"Lewis: [Enquiring after the chain-smoking female priest] Who, cigar and cassock?"

"Sister: And what, may I ask, are you doing with my patient?!"

"Harry Field's answering machine: Hello, this is Harry. Health, Wealth and Happiness! Leave a message - for God's sake!"

"Morse: (Reads) Lignum crucis arbor scientiae... the wood of the cross is the tree of knowledge."

"Morse: Hello, Harry - I got your note."

"Lewis: Tired, Sir?"

"Morse: Here we are again, Lewis. Piecing together the last moments of a total stranger."

"Lewis: A Vincent 'Black Shadow' motorcycle, registration number Oh Ay Eff ..."

"Ian Kerr: Right, what have you got for me?"

"Ian Kerr: What's this?"

"Jerome Hogg: You must know her...the face that launched a thousand clips. That's a technical TV term."

"Morse: Watch the mouth: it gives away what the face is trying to hide."

"Tuckerman: Wouldn't you think they'd simply jump at the chance to show it abroad. Think of the media blitz there'd be!"

"Tuckerman: This is the time of the high-fliers, Inspector. Only the brain-dead stay on the ground."

"Morse: Almost operatic. Greek Tragedy. You should try the Classice sometime, Lewis. Sex is never simple there: there's pleasure, then there's payment. Retribution."

"Morse: They don't spell Australian beer with four X's out of ignorance!"

"Ann Harding: You're a bastard, Morse."

"Lewis: ...and my name's Robert. My friends call me 'Robbie'."

"Supt. Strange: You said it was suicide, Morse. Then some GP comes down from Ben Nevis, waving some pages of A4 - and everything changes!"

"Morse: It was Mrs. Fallon I knew - before she became Mrs Fallon. We were engaged to be married."

"Susan Fallon: Did you hate me ...?"