"That's nothing, it's a...birthmark."

"Hard six coming out."

"It's my long-life food preservative. The FDA finally approved it!"

"Eddie, This is great! They don't have any of these games at the Mirage."

"His name is not Papagiorgio. His name is Rusty Griswold and he's a C+ student!"

"Don't think unnatural thoughts about your cousin, Rus."

"...and he want's to enter that garden, with a knowledge, and a mulch..."

"Oh, Keno! This is easy."

"(after an attempt to have sex with Clark in the bathroom goes horribly wrong) I'll never fly again."

"My pen burst. (after hotel employee notices Clark's arm is blue from falling in the plane's toilet)"