Webcomics

"Hannelore: I, uh, thought you might've snapped and, um, started killing everyone."

"Faye: What's with the cricket bat, Hanners?"

"Marten: I call dibs on Doras three through fifteen. Gonna start me a clone-harem."

"Dora: Then once they perfect cloning technology, you can have Dora-2."

"Tai: My ideal is basically you, only single."

"Marten: "Sure, my lawn is made of solid gold, but my neighbor's AstroTurf looks so inviting.""

"Pintsize: When the singularity hits I will BECOME PORN."

"Marten: Friends... right..."

"Dora: Aww, look! They're friends!"

"[Mieville rubs all over Pintsize, purring.]"

"[Mieville gives him a slasher smile.]"

"Pintsize: That's right, approach and submit to me, the superior being! Th- that's close enough... uh..."

"[Pintsize is meeting Dora's cat, Mieville, for the first time.]"

"Hannelore: I MUST ELIMINATE ALL WITNESSES OF MY CRIME."

"Faye: You are a true friend, Flower Pits."

"Dora: You better. If there are any dents or scratches on him I'm keeping the security deposit."

"Faye: I'm taking your boyfriend to dinner, Dora. I promise to return him in pristine condition."

"Faye: I have great tits coded right into my genes!"

"Angus: I maybe a social leper, but at least my weirdo shut-in gamer roommate still likes me! HOORAY!"

"Steve: Who the hell have you been going on dates with?"

"Cosette: Meh, could be worse. You wanna come upstairs?"

"[Beat panel.]"

"Steve: Haha, well, you know that picture of me flexin' in front of the grizzly bear? That's actually my girlfriend. But don't worry, we have an open relationship."

"Marten: Dear universe: if this is really how you work, may I please have a 1952 Telecaster?"

"Tai: Guys this started off as a fun little diversion but if I end up having to testify in court I'm gonna be SO PISSED."

"Marten: Stop messing with my dad, guys. You're gonna give him a heart attack."

"Maurice: Oh Henry, you're gonna be a father! Again!"

"Henry: W-what..."

"Faye: Not at all! I think our arrangement is gonna work out just fine. I'm pretty sure I was ovulating, and I feel the most wonderful... GLOW this morning, just like mom did when I was conceived! Now remember, fifty grand when it's born or the little bastard goes to China to make Nikes."

"Henry: Faye, it was lovely meeting you. I, ah, about last night, did I do something... untoward?"

"Dora: OH MY GOD YOU ARE GONNA BE SO HOT WHEN YOU GO GRAY"

"Tai: I'm glad you have a sense of humor, but could you please not bring it to work with you?"

"Dora: "Us?" No, no, no, I'm a small business owner. You're the underachieving peon."

"Marten: You have a black velvet painting of yourself in your bedroom?"

"Pintsize: Aw, man, now I want wang-limbs."

"Hannelore: Ohhhhh."

"Dora: You put it down on the counter, then go back to your apartment and go to sleep."

"Hannelore: How... how does it work?"

"Dora: It's coffee. Like you asked for?"

"Hannelore: Um, what's this?"

"Faye: I demand a tumbler full of gin and a fainting couch!"

"Faye: Aww, it's been FOREVER since I've had to punch you! What a delightful wave of nostalgia!"

"Pintsize: Do not mock the Breast Jihad!"

"Marten: It's an awful mixed analogy, but I'd watch the SHIT out of that if it was on ESPN."

"Angus: So I should watch out for the bears, but not be afraid to swing if they toss me a ball?"

"Marten: But I figure you're better off strikin' out swingin' than watchin' the balls go past."

"Marten: Dude, if a park ranger warns you about the bears, it ain't cause he's tryin' to keep all the bear hugs for himself."

"Marten: Bartender, fetch us some frosty beers and fancy outfits!"

"Sven: My artistic integrity wears a gimp suit and lives in a box."

"Marten: Actually, I'll use a net. Hannelore will administer a sedative, and Dora will drive the getaway van."