"The Narrator: As Shrek and the others are parked upon his royal quest, Fiona returns the castle. There, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, Cinderella and Rapunzel did what all royal princesses do in times like this: sit tea."

"Sleeping Beauty: It's what all royal princesses do in times like this."

"Fiona: You'll never find him."

"Lancelot: Unhand me! You've insulted Lancelot's honor for the final time!"

"Shrek: And you'll have a whole kingdom calling you that, if we ever get there. Now move it, Peaches!"

"Shrek: Lancelot? I thought you were Arthur."

"Shrek: Peaches. Come on, we've got a ship to catch."

"Lancelot: What did you call me?"

"Lancelot: You said it again!"

"Lancelot: That's one insult too many! You should face me on the field of battle!"

"The Narrator: He did the next best thing."

"Prisoner: We don't like royalty!"

"Shrek: (Groans) You can have the sword, I just want the kid."

"Witch: You'll never get the sword, Shrek!"

"Witch: Too bad! You're not getting either! Get him, girls!"

"Jock: Nerd!"

"Jock: Oh! You made a funny. Now go play your silly game."

"Shrek: Boy, do I have a surprise for you! What's this?"

"Donkey: Hey Shrek! Head's up!"

"Shrek: Here comes the drawbridge... and you must be the welcoming committee. Hey, kid. Which one is Artie?"

"Puss in Boots: The Puss in Boots fears nothing!"

"Artie: Um, that tall one over there. But he prefers to go by his nickname Peaches."

"Puss in Boots: Have no fear, boss. I shall scale the impenetrable fortress and clear the path."

"Shrek: Doesn't anybody ever leave a gate open?"

"Shrek: Okay..."

"Jock: Heh... wait 'til Artie sees what we're going to do to his horse. Witches! If you've come to play, you're gonna pay."

"Donkey: Throw the soccer ball at the witch, Shrek!"

"Shrek: [repeat line] Get back here with that key! [To Geek] Now you're getting on my nerves."

"Jock: Wait! You're not Guinevere! Aaaaaagh!"

"Geek: You're not high enough level to exit this maze!"

"Geek: Eeeaahh!"