"Friendship's an empty name, made to deceive Those whose good nature tempts them to believe: There's no such thing on earth; the best that we Can hope for here is faint neutrality."

"Happiness is a stranger to mankind, And, like to a forc'd motion, it is ever Strongest at the beginning; then languishing With time, grows weary of our company."

"Anything's hard to find if you go around looking for it with your eyes shut."

"Oh! I must take my shoes off. Huh! Hell hath no fury like a woman’s corns, has it?"

"He is a fool who thinks by force or skill To turn the current of a woman's will."

"He, who the rules of temperance neglects, From a good cause may produce vile effects."

"Why don't you learn from my mistakes? It takes half your time to learn from your own."

"... Poles seem to be as much condemned to a diet of caviar, vodka and the Polka as the English are to rare old port and pheasant."

"For 'tis not where we lie, but whence we fell; The loss of heaven's the greatest pain in hell."

"We teach you the pleasure of physical exercise—the team-spirit of games, too, for when you leave school finally you will find that life is a game, sometimes serious, sometimes fun, but a game that must be played with true team-spirit—there is no room for the outsider in life."

"The only consolation I can find in your immediate presence is your ultimate absence."

"My usual self is a very unusual self."

"There aren't enough secrets to go round anymore. Some spies are having to invent secrets in order to earn a living. I can't help wondering what will happen when redundant spies join the ranks of the unemployed."

"He was very ugly but people can't help the faces they're born with."

"According to her, only a revolution will ever bring true democracy to this country and the sooner revolution comes (she said) the better and even though hundreds of innocents will be slaughtered they will die in a good cause and men must be willing to sacrifice themselves. But that depends I suppose on which men you're thinking of."

"Has difficulty distinguishing fact from fiction. This girl is a liar. Expect Improvement next term."

"He didn't play with his food anymore till it got cold; instead, down it went like fuel into a furnace keeping the ovens hot, and the energy at boiling point, as Tom hurtled through his life catching up with himself at last."

"That, let us rail at women, scorn and flout 'em, We may live with, but cannot live without 'em."

"Man was made when Nature was but an apprentice, but woman when she was a skilful mistress of her art."

"Who trusts himself to women, or to waves, Should never hazard what he fears to lose."

"Oh! say not woman's heart is bought With vain and empty treasure. * * * * * Deep in her heart the passion glows; She loves and loves forever."

"No time like the present."

"Nobody minded what you did in bed or what you said about God, a very civilized attitude in 1948."

"Scholarship was one thing, drudgery another."

"I loved the Army as an institution and loathed every single thing it required me to do."

"Christ asked for everything he got."

"In becoming the universe God abdicated. He destroyed himself as God. He turned what he had been, his true self, into nullity and thereby forfeited the Godlike qualities which pertained to him. The universe which he has become is also his grave. He has no control in it or over it. God, as God, is dead."

"The highest moral character can procure one no preference among the shades."

"And so, at the age of thirty, I had successively disgraced myself with three fine institutions, each of which had made me free of its full and rich resources, had trained me with skill and patience, and had shown me nothing but forbearance and charity when I failed in trust."

"Dusk is the time when men whisper of matters about which they remain silent in the full light of the sun."

"Gentlemen can now only behave as such, or be tolerated as such, in circumstances that are manifestly contrived or unreal."

"He replaced his glasses, which were now smeared with mucus, and manfully assumed what he liked to think was the cautious but enlightened manner of one born to high responsibility which only conscience forbade him abrogate as modesty suggested."

"Rose girl, bearing your posies, What are you coming to sell? Is it yourself or your roses, Or yourself and your roses as well?"

"Yes, I’m in love, I feel it now, And Caelia has undone me, And yet I’ll swear I can’t tell how The pleasing plague stole on me."

"Her voice, her touch, might give th’ alarm— ’Twas both perhaps, or neither, In short, ’twas that provoking charm Of Caelia altogether."

"Life's too short for chess."

"This gardener's rule applies to youth and age, When young sow wild oats, but when old grow sage."

"Love levels all,—it elevates the clown, And often brings the fattest people down."

"The least drop in the world I do not mind: "Cognac"'s a noun I never yet declin'd."

"Smart soldiers like to be well tightened in: Loose habits would destroy all discipline."

"My dog, who picks up everything one teaches, Has got "three heads," like Mr. Gladstone's speeches, But, as might naturally be expected, His are considerably more connected."

"I have been in love, and in debt, and in drink, This many and many a year."

"Come, blessed peace, we once again implore, And let our pains be less, or power more."

"[E]xtreme happiness invites religion almost as much as extreme misery."

"Love and a cottage! Eh, Fanny! Ah, give me indifference and a coach and six!"

"In the corridors under there is nothing but sleep. And stiller than ever on orchard boughs they keep Tryst with the moon, and deep is the silence, deep On moon-washed apples of wonder."