"Motherfucking cocksucker motherfucking shoot Mother what am I doing? What am I doing? I don't know what I'm doing. I'm doing the best that I can. I know that's all I can ask of myself. Is that good enough? Is my work doing any good? Is anybody paying attention? Is it hopeless to try and change things? The African guy is a sign, right? Because if he isn't, than nothing in this world makes any sense to me. I'm trapped! Maybe I should quit. Don't quit! Maybe I should just fucking quit. Don't fucking quit! I don't know what the fuck I'm supposed to do anymore! Mother! Fuck shoot!"

"We're not in Infinity, we're in the suburbs"

"[about the body bag exercise] I can't go back in there. It's all hating faces that I have to chop up with a machete!"

"Nobody sits like this rock sits. You rock, rock. The rock just sits and is. You show us how to just sit here and that's what we need."

"'Betrayed' by Albert Markovski. Is it possible for anybody in this world to work together to make it better? I don't think so."

"If this world is temporary, identity is an illusion, then everything is meaningless and it doesn't matter if you use petroleum, and that's got me very confused."

"How am I not myself? [repeated]"

"Huckabees cornucopia of stuff we all want. But what happened to the gazelles? Were they squashed under the CD department?"

"What?! Is it a crime? Is it a crime to look at Lange?!"

"[to Vivian Jaffe] I can't believe you guys actually exist."

"Everything is the same, even if it's different."

"Vivian Jaffe: Come, join us for mancala hour. Arriba!"

"Shania Twain: I eat Tofu Tuna, Brad!"

"Caterine Vauban: It is inevitable to be drawn back into human drama."

"Caterine Vauban: It's painful enough to feel sad, but on top of it... to feel embarrassed for feeling, that's the killer!"

"Do you love me? Even in my bonnet?"

"There's glass between us"

"You can't deal with my infinite nature, can you?"

"[emotionless] These are the best tops around. Last time, last year - not so good. [suddenly fervent] But now, this is the truth!"

"Fuckabees!"

"Wake up, pretty girl, the joke is on you!"

"I'm in my tree talking to the Dixie Chicks and they're making me feel better."

"The universe is an infinite sphere whose center is everywhere and whose circumference is nowhere."

"Your mind is always occupied on something...so it may as well be something helpful, like Mrs. Shermer, or the blanket."

"No time for infinity? Gotta piece together a theory?"

"Say this blanket represents all the matter and energy in the universe, okay? This is me, this is you, And over here, this is the Eiffel Tower, right, it's Paris!"

"There is no remainder in the mathematics of Infinity."

"There's no such thing as nothing. nnn"

"There is no such thing as you or me,"

"When you get the blanket thing you can relax because everything you could ever want or be you already have and are."

"Did you see that? Shania knew who I was."

"[after Caterine snaps a photo of his sobbing] NOBODY SEES THAT PICTURE!!!"

"Why is marriage and kids so important? I mean, there's an overpopulation problem!"

"Shania cares!"

"Shania hates mayo, alright, and she can't eat chicken salad, that's no joke. We gave it to her once, she threw up in the limo - the lady hates chicken salad. So I bring out a bunch of tuna fish sandwiches - she still doesn't believe me - I say, Shania, I'm allergic to mayo - which, by the way, is a lie. Shania still doesn't believe me so I eat two of the sandwiches in front of her to prove it. So she eats one and a half sandwiches, one and a half sandwiches... before she realizes, its chicken salad. And she liked them!"

"Do I benefit from getting some great P.R. For Huckabees when we need it? Absolutely. But do I care about saving the open spaces? Yes, I do!"

"Mrs. Silver: God, what are you, a bitch? You're a bitch! How many kids do you have, bitch?"

"Jason Schwartzman — Albert Markovski"

"Mark Wahlberg — Tommy Corn"

"Jude Law — Brad Stand"

"Naomi Watts — Dawn Campbell"

"Dustin Hoffman — Bernard Jaffe"

"Lily Tomlin — Vivian Jaffe"

"Isabelle Huppert — Caterine Vauban"