"Strong Bad: Now listen. I've got enough classic motion tweens and deprecated actions in ol' F-Sack here to last us at least six months until we can learn HTML5."

"Homestar Runner: Ooh, I know what that stands for! Hyper-Text Markup Lotion! [holds up lotion] Let me poop a little bit out for you. Thbbt thbbt thbbt."

"Homestar Runner: Oohhh, I got you. Sounds like somebody's asking for another heaping helping of... Deep Impact! Strong Bad, this is Morgan Shawshank, I need you to hit that meteor with every Duvall you've got."

"Strong Bad: Never mind. I'll be in Bubs' fallout shelter if anybody needs me. Good luck with yourself, Homestar."

"Strong Bad: Wrong movie."

"Homestar Runner: Wait, those were two different movies? But they both came out, like, the same summer even."

"Strong Sad: I already told you, I don't want to be called that any more! I made a mistake!"

"Strong Bad: Oh, sorry, Dairy Queen. Anyways, look. I just thought you should know that all your underwears somehow ended up individually priced and labeled in an online auction."

"Strong Bad: That was too easy. Now to settle down for the 24-hour Caleb Rentpayer marathon!"

"Tuxworth: [on TV] Caleb, were you making a little tent out of my jacket?"

"Bubs: I've got terrible, terrible news, Homestar."

"Homestar Runner: Oh, no! Is it about the good times?"

"Homestar Runner: Bubs, are you an unethical quack?"

"Bubs: The most quackinest!"

"Strong Bad: You-ka— w-wha?"

"Tuxworth: [on TV] Homestar Runner... did you shoot Caleb?"

"Strong Bad: You traitor! You shot my favorite TV show!"

"Announcer: Listen up, short children! It's the Fluffy Puff Air-Puffed Sugar Delights Presents The Homestar Runner Progrum [sic]! In a color!"

"Sickly Sam: [observing a hole in the boardwalk] What a pleasant hole. I can't say 'nough good things about this hole."

"Old-Timey Strong Bad: Curses, you bone-legged boob! I'll pump you generously full of lead, shot at high velocity out of my pistola so as to pierce the flesh! Or in your case, the burlap sack! [Sickly Sam grabs him and begins swallowing him, very slowly] Rrrah! I can't believe I'm being eaten! What a tragedy! I was supposed to sell you to the glue factory and whatnot! I can't believe I'm still being eaten! This is taking so much longer than I expected!"

"Mr. Shmallow: Each delight is hand puffed with a blend of only the finest airs. Air-puffing is surely the future of eating delicious foodstuffs."

"Mr. Shmallow: Add open flames to create a flavor taste that will send you to the moon!"

"The Homestar Runner: I read that a ghost."

"Old-Timey Marzipan: You read that a ghost what?"

"Old-Timey Marzipan: You read that a ghost is what?"

"The Homestar Runner: I read that a ghost is here in town and there's a 27 cent ree-ward for its capture."

"Old-Timey Marzipan:: Where's the ghost?"

"Old-Timey Strong Bad: Behold! The fantoustic [sic] phantasm."

"Sickly Sam: I bury myself alive on Tuesdays."

"Old-Timey Strong Bad: Criminy crickets! Foiled again!"

"Marshie: [crying backstage] WHAT MORE DO THEY WANT?!"

"Strong Bad: I thought you said you were the star of this one."

"Strong Bad: What are you doing!?"

"Homestar Runner: Isn't that the sound that um... eyeballs make?"

"Strong Mad:: IT'S PERSONAL!"

"Homestar Runner: Hey guys! H'whatcha teekenbot [sic]?"

"Homestar Runner: Oh, tattoos, huh?"

"Strong Mad: THIS HALLOWEEN'S NOT WORKING!"

"Strong Bad: This place is a disgrace to haunted houses, haunted hovels, haunted timeshares, and haunted extended stay motels even."

"Strong Bad: Then there would be... the gross out room. But instead of severed limbs, and surgeries gone wrong, it's just a silent white room filled with pure stench. And, oh, ho, ho. What a stench it is! Let me lay it on you like a movie trailer: Strong Mad! Oyster! Smoothie! Breath! Caked! Armpit! Latte!"

"Strong Bad: There'd also be one of those immersive horror experience rooms that are so popular these days."

"Strong Sad: OK. Gotta logic this out. Open the vault… before time runs out. Skeleton's pointing at a clue. Am I on the right track?"

"Strong Bad: It's full of poop."

"Strong Sad: But that's just misdirection."

"Strong Sad: They want me to think I should reach in the toilet."

"Strong Bad: No! I do want you to reach in the toilet! That is all that I want you to do!"

"Strong Bad: Touch the freakin' poop!!"

"Coach Z: The people need your help!"