Homestar Runner

"Strong Bad: According to Coolguy's Law, the popularity of the host is inversely proportional to the amount of fun you can have at their house."

"Homestar Runner: What did you say the name of this family card game was again, Strong Bad?"

"Strong Bad: This is called Find The Load Bearer. You never played this before?"

"Homestar Runner: No. Find The Load Bearer, Bed Axe, I never heard of any of these games we're playing."

"Strong Bad: Whoa! Jackpot! Blood Bleeder, Head Chopper 2, Scab Wars, Blistergeist? Most of these things have been taken off the market!"

"Homestar Runner: Oh. Those are off-limits. We're only allowed to play Clapping Party."

"Strong Bad: But if you're looking for a guaranteed good time, you need to get invited to an OLDER KID'S slumber party. Anything goes at those things!"

"[Cut to Coach Z’s locker room]"

"Bubs: My cousin Louis, he's dead. My cousin Harold, he's dead."

"Coach Z: And my back still hurts. And my knees still hurt. And my head still hurts."

"The King of Town: Government ain't right! Government ain't right!"

"BubsSo : my escrow carried over into my lumbago, but then my sciatica started acting up."

"Strong Bad: Uh, can you guys start using some words that were invented after the year nineteen-oh-zero?"

"The King of Town: Come now, young whipper-snapper. My fellows and I were just about to start playing at games of chance!"

"Strong Bad: Lemme guess. That doesn't include Bed Axe."

"[cut back to Strong Bad at his computer]"

"Strong Bad: Uh, you might wanna put a cap on what you define as "older kids.""

"Strong Bad: Other than that, you can always look forward to endlessly ridiculing the kid that got picked up early 'cause he misses his mom. Strong Sad used to do that when we'd have slumber parties in our own basement!"

"Strong Sad: That only happened once!"

"Strong Bad: Uh-huh..."

"Strong Sad: A week..."

"Strong Bad: Keep going."

"Strong Sad: For ten years..."

"Strong Bad: There you go!"

"Strong Bad: [Webcomics are] all about video games, gamernerds, webgeeks, dorknerds, gamewads, nerdgames, webwebs, and elves."

"Strong Bad: Another approach is to just ask for input from your viewers and rip that off for content. [turns around to face the camera] Pfff. What a cop-out."

"Strong Bad: Borgorroth of Coolswordorroth shimmies for no man!"

"Strong Bad: Or if you can't draw, never fear, just steal some graphics from your favorite video game, and add yet another unlicensed pixel comic to the overcrowded, overstunk landfill of web comics."

"Strong Bad: Everyone knows that putting “web” in front of words automatically makes them crappier. Just look what happened to “pages”, and “cams”, and “logs”. And who could forget the fall of the mighty “isode”. Ohh, so tragic."

"Strong Bad: Well, Gardenboy, as a crafty ring veteran, I can let you in on a little secret. Being an awesome wrestler has nothing to do with awesome wrestling moves! It’s all about awesome costumes, gimmicks, and dinosaur tranquilizer fueled ranting and raving. I got my first big break with cable access’ longest named wrestling organization, All World Mid-Pro Shirtless Championship Entertainment or AWMPSCE. Of course they wanted me to be one of those lame masked wrestlers at first, but I have gimmickier plans."

"Strong Bad: Dioramas shouldn't be wasted, Mollyman. This is probably the only school-approved opportunity to melt small plastic animals and shame our beloved literary characters that you're ever gonna get. I say embrace it! I say deface it!!"

"Strong Bad: Now let's talk about topics. If the assignment calls for a science diorama, just slap some glue on some cotton balls and bang! The effects of cumulonimbus clouds on sheep, snowmen, aaaand... cotton... balls."

"Strong Bad: The easiest way to get around reading an actual book is to make one up yourself! I can't tell you how many dioramas I got out of The King Of Town's Adventures in Giant Cockroachland! Books one through seven. Though with the Internet, it's probably easier for teachers to check your sources than in my day. To get away with that now, you'd also have to make a fake website for the book, and the author, and the publisher, and just to be safe, maybe go ahead and actually write the book. Man, it’s gotten so hard to cheat these days!"

"Strong Sad: Strong Bad, are you putting on body spray?"

"Strong Bad: Shut up! Guys don't wear body spray. This is uh... the blood... of slain... warrior... mammoths."

"Strong Mad: [“reading” fast food bag] YOU'RE NOT ON THE LIST!"

"Strong Bad: The list?! You're looking at a greasy bag of fast food!"

"Strong Mad: DON'T BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF! [laughs]"

"Strong Bad: Wait, what? Strong Mad, did you just make a joke?!"

"Marzipan: You don't look like you're having very much fun, Strong Sad."

"Strong Sad: Oh I'm having a great time. This is my favorite club to go to, and not dance. Sometimes I'll even think about dancing, and then not dance. And if I'm feeling really crazy, I'll actually get out on the dance floor, and bust some fresh not-dancing."

"Marzipan: Then how about I start busting some fresh not-hanging-out-with-you."

"Strong Bad: [voiceover] And at some point during the night, we all get "treated" to Coach Z attempting to freestyle."

"Coach Z: One two one two, 'bout to freestyle... One, two? One two?"

"Strong Bad: [voiceover] I mean... count to two over and over again."

"Gel-Arshie: I'M AN ABOMINATION! And I'm comin' to your house after school!"

"Strong Bad: [voiceover] Y'know, I really think those Marshie commercials ought to be rated NC-17. [caption appears in the top left corner, reading "NC-17, Needlessly Creepy times 17"]"

"Strong Bad: The true sign of being famous is in the unlicensed stuff! And we're all over that! In fact, we've got our own application process for becoming an officially licensed unlicensed seller of Strong Bad and The Cheat knock-offs."

"Strong Bad: The main requirements are that the country of manufacture has changed name five times since I was in seventh grade; that you sell your wares from a blanket; that you always refer to the selling of our items as "numba [sic] one bargain!"; and that one of us has to have a human nose."

"Strong Bad: Just as I suspected! Totally legit looking stuff! Where are the human noses? The misspellings? The choking hazards?"