"Pretty, huh. Why shouldn't he date a young chick? Why take the bus when you can fly?"

"[during a raucous party] If this wasn't my house, I'd go home!"

"The only thing I've never gotten is why parents never run away."

"Molly the Maid: False hair, false eyelashes, false bosoms. In my day women were flesh and blood, now they're 70% nylo…"

"Zip: Thou art cool!"

"Keeping this family together isn't child's play!"

"Does this look like a movie that could give you bad dreams?"

"The return of the happy ending."

"Doris Day - Abby McClure"

"Brian Keith - Jake Iverson"