"I turned down $2 million for this script. There's absolutely no way that had I filmed the script through a major stud…"

"I try to make them understand it's not about getting pussy, it's about having fun. It's not about getting drunk, it's…"

"Redheadedcalin doll: Doll comes with an innocent smile. Pull her string and doesn't speak, she just opens her legs."

"You see, I have fucked an amputee and a set of twins. If you add in a midget, you are looking at a legendary trifecta…"

"I gave her an unmistakable "I want to fuck you" look, she shot me back a quick "My spine hurts" face, and I was smitten."

"EEK EEK EEK!! That's dolphin for 'I'm sorry.' But you already knew that.."

"Tucker: You guys going to Milwaukee? Guy: Yes sir, heading home after a vacation. Tucker: Did you know there are midg…"

"Nose full of fart, mouth full of cock, she never even paused."

"I'm sorry, but I stand by my decision. I am now a member of the elite club of people that have fought a professional …"

"The biggest thing I learned was, especially the way I operate and how I am as a person, if I'm going to do a creative…"