"[Opening narration] Ever had one of those nights that starts out like any other, but ends up being the best night of …"

"[to Bed and Breakfast clerk] Tonight, we will be partaking of a liquid repast, as we wend our way up the Golden Mile,…"

"To "err" is human, so errrr..."

"There's only one Gary King!"

"[reaction to Andrew ordering tap water instead of beer] I don't believe this. A man of your legendary prowess drinkin…"

"How can you tell if you're drunk if you're never sober?"

"[whilst debating what to call the blanks] Nothing suggested in the last three minutes has been better than 'smashy sm…"

"[Facing an army of blanks] (Tearing open his Shirt like the Hulk) UUUGHGH!!! I FUCKING HATE THIS TOWN!"

"[repeated line to Gary] It's pointless arguing with you."

"A comedy about a teacher and a very memorable student."