"We're not going to Cuba! We're going to America!"

"So there was actually one place on American soil with free, universal healthcare. [cut to aerial picture of Guantanam…"

"[to a British couple in hospital] So how much did you have to pay for the baby?"

"They think in terms of "we", not "me"."

"If this is what can happen between supposed enemies, if one enemy can hold out his hand and offer to heal, then what …"

"In the meantime, I'm going to get the government to do my laundry."

"We got issue in America. Too many good docs are getting out of business. Too many OB/GYNs aren't able to practice the…"

"This might hurt a little."

"What seems to be the problem?"

"For many Americans, laughter isn't the best medicine - it's the only medicine."