"Siobhan Fallon Hogan as Beatrice"

"You sold a reverberating carbonizer with mutate capacity to an unlicensed cephalopoid, Jeebs, you piece of...!"

"[To Jeebs] I want you on the next transport off this rock, or I'm gonna shoot you where it don't grow back."

"A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals, and you know it."

"1,500 years ago, everybody knew that the Earth was the center of the universe. 500 years ago, everybody knew that the…"

"That is a lot of fun, it's a universal translator. We're not even supposed to have it, and I'll tell you why: human t…"

"[After J accidentally activates a device that causes havoc around the headquarters] This thing caused the 1977 New Yo…"

"Imagine a giant cockroach, with unlimited strength, a massive inferiority complex, and a real short temper, is tear-a…"

"[To Beatrice] No, ma'am. We at the FBI do not have a sense of humor we're aware of."

"Tony Shalhoub as Jack Jeebs"