"He related that an itinerant quack came to Venice, on whose sign was pictured a Priapus divided, at certain intervals, by band-strings. A certain Venetian came up, and enquired the meaning of those partitions. The quack, for the fun of the thing, replied that membrum suum was endowed with such a peculiar property, that if, with a woman, he used but the first part, he begot merchants; if the second, soldiers; up to the third, Generals; up to the fourth, Popes; his fee being proportionate to the rank and quality ordered. The dolt took his word for it, and, after a conference with his wife, brought him to his house, and bargained for a soldier. As soon as the quack had set about the job, the husband made a pretence of withdrawing, but hid himself behind the bed; when he saw the pair hard at work manufacturing the soldier agreed upon, he rushed forward, and giving the man's backside a vigorous push, so as to secure the advantage even of the fourth division: "By God's Holy Gospel," be shouted, "this will be a Pope!" fancying he had diddled the fellow."
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No. 161: A Doltish Venetian Made a Fool of by an Itinerant Quack
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