"If you can't make it better, you can laugh at it."

"I remember thinking how often we look, but never see … we listen, but never hear … we exist, but never feel. We take …"

"It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else*"

"The grass is always greener over the septic tank."

"If Life is a Bowl of Cherries, What Am I Doing in the Pits?"

"Enjoying an extraordinary knowledge of languages (ancient and modern), literature, and art, by his cultured personali…"

"When young persons are summoned from this world ere they have mingled in its sinful pursuits, they can be readily yie…"

"He was a horse of goodly countenance, rather expressive of vigilance than fire; though an unnatural appearance of fie…"

"In the younger days of the Republic there lived in the county of —— two men, who were admitted on all hands to be the…"

"It is said that a hundred gamecocks will live in perfect harmony together it you do not put a hen with them; and so i…"