Wimbledon (film)

"Oh my god, shouldn't he be off learning about masturbation or something?"

"Ron, I genuinely despise you."

"And may I say good body – luck! Shit."

"Carl, you bastard."

"Lizzie, Lizzie, don't say a word. I was thinking a repeat of the other night, like Fish and Chips, early to bed... Mr Bradbury, hello. Mr Bradbury?"

"My parents are still together, which proves that love is not only blind, it's bloody stupid."

"The reality is another story, my story. See that good looking fella? No, not the kid in white – the other tired, good looking fella. Yeah, him. Well, that's me. British Davis Cup, long time ago. Two singles titles, even longer ago. Presently ranked 119th in the world. Sport is cruel. Now, I know it doesn't sound too bad. 4 million tennis players in the world and I'm 119th, but what that really means is this: 118 guys out there are faster, stronger, better and younger."

"[Walking out onto Centre Court] Fuck a duck."

"[After winning Wimbledon] Can I retire now, Mum?"

"What are you talking about. The chalk flew up there's a mark right there."

"Hit this one... and I'll sleep with you."

"Too bad, you could have used the workout."

"So that's cucumber cucumber and cucumber, they forgot to put the sandwich in my sandwich."

"I really don't care who wins, I represent both players It's like asking which of my kids do I love more. Which of my kids do I love more? My daughter speak to you later."

"Call Letterman, call Leno, call Oprah."

"Kirsten Dunst as Lizzie Bradbury"

"Paul Bettany as Peter Colt"

"Sam Neill as Dennis Bradbury"

"Jon Favreau as Ron Roth"

"Bernard Hill as Edward Colt"

"Eleanor Bron as Augusta Colt"

"Nikolaj Coster-Waldau as Dieter Prohl"

"Austin Nichols as Jake Hammond"

"Robert Lindsay as Ian Frazier"

"James McAvoy as Carl Colt"

"John McEnroe as John McEnroe"

"Chris Evert as Court Commentator Chris Evert"

"Mary Carillo as Court Commentator Mary Carillo"

"John Barrett as Court Commentator John Barrett"