The Producers (1967 film)

"Mr. Bialystock, I cannot FUNCTION under these conditions! [pulls out his blue blanket and hugs it] You're making me extremely nervous."

"GIMME MY BLUE BLANKET!!!"

"It's just that I've had it ever since I was a baby, and I find it very comforting."

"Max! Please don't say that word again."

"Let's assume, just for the moment, that you are a dishonest man."

"You're gonna jump on me."

"Go away, go away. You frighten me."

"How humiliating. Max Bialystock. Max Bialystock. You know who I used to be? Max Bialystock! King of Broadway! Six shows running at once! Lunch at Delmonico's. $200 suits. You see this? This once held a pearl as big as your eye! Look at me now. LOOK AT ME NOW! I'm wearing a cardboard belt! I used to have thousands of investors begging, pleading to put their money in a Max Bialystock production. Look at my investors now. [He opens a cabinet with pictures of wealthy, elderly women] Voila! Hundreds of little old ladies stopping off at Max Bialystock's office to grab a last thrill on the way to the cemetery! [To Leo] You have exactly 10 seconds to change that look of disgusting pity into one of enormous respect. One, two... Do the books. Do the books...Window's so filthy, can't tell whether it's day or night out there."

"That's it, baby, when you've got it, flaunt it, flaunt it!"

"That's exactly why we want to produce this play. To show the world the true Hitler, the Hitler you loved, the Hitler you knew, the Hitler with a song in his heart."

"How could this happen? I was so careful. I picked the wrong play, the wrong director, the wrong cast. Where did I go right?"

"Bloom, look at me. Look at me, Bloom! Bloom, I'm drowning. Other men sail through life. Bialystock has struck a reef. Bloom, I'm going under. I'm being sunk by a society that demands success when all I can offer is failure. Bloom, I'm reaching out to you. Don't send me to prison. [bellowing] HELP!!!"

"Next time I produce a play, no author."

"You lousy fruit! You RUINED ME!!"

"Springtime for Hitler and Germany Deutschland is happy and gay. We're marching to a faster pace Look out, here comes the master race! Springtime for Hitler and Germany Winter for Poland and France. Springtime for Hitler and Germany Come on, Germans, go into your dance."

"I was born in Dusseldorf, and that is why they call me Rolf!"

"Don't be stupid! Be a smartie! Come and join the Nazi Party!"

"Springtime for Hitler and Germany (two rifle shots) Goosestep's the new step today. (machine-gun fire) Bombs falling from the skies again (explosion) Deutschland is on the rise again! Springtime for Hitler and Germany U-boats are sailing once more. Springtime for Hitler and Germany Means that soon we'll be going to war!"

"Leo Bloom: [reading the title of the play for the first time] "Springtime for Hitler: A Gay Romp with Adolf and Eva at Berchtesgaden"... Wow..."

"Franz Liebekind: I am the author. You are the audience. I outrank you!"

"Franz Liebekind: Adolf Elizabeth Hitler"

"Zero Mostel - Max Bialystock"

"Gene Wilder - Leo Bloom"

"Kenneth Mars - Franz Liebkind"

"Estelle Winwood - Hold me, Touch me"

"Renee Taylor - Eva Braun"

"Christopher Hewett - Roger De Bris"

"Lee Meredith - Ulla"

"William Hickey - The drunk"

"Andreas Voutsinas - Carmen Ghia"

"David Patch - Goebbels"

"Dick Shawn - Lorenzo St. DuBois (L.S.D.)"

"Barney Martin - Goring"