The Light Fantastic

"A Thaum is the basic unit of magical strength. It has been universally established as the amount of magic needed to create one small white pigeon or three normal-sized billiard balls."

"The sun rose slowly, as if it wasn't sure it was worth all the effort."

"The pen is mightier than the sword ... if the sword is very short, and the pen is very sharp."

"The disc, being flat, has no real horizon. Any adventurous sailor who got funny ideas from staring at eggs and oranges for too long and set out for the antipodes soon learned that the reason why distant ships sometimes looked as though they were disappearing over the edge of the world was that they were disappearing over the edge of the world."

"I suppose you wouldn't happen to know the way out of the forest, possibly, by any chance?"

"There had been an unseen observer of all this. It was of course entirely against the rules, but Trymon knew all about rules and had always considered they were for making, not obeying."

"He wanted to say all this, and couldn't. For a man with an itch to see the whole of infinity, Twoflower never actually moved outside his own head. Telling him the truth would be like kicking a spaniel."

"Weems might have had a room-temperature IQ, but he knew idiocy when he saw it."

"Early to rise, early to bed, makes a man healthy, wealthy and dead."

"'Dead?' said Rincewind, In the debating chamber of his mind a dozen emotions got to their feet and started shouting. Relief was in full spate when Shock cut in on a point of order and then Bewilderment, Terror and Loss started a fight which was ended only when Shame slunk in from next door to see what all the row was about."

"Darkness isn't the opposite of light, it is simply its absence."

"Ankh-Morpork!"

"The voice didn't believe in gods, which in Rincewind's book was fair enough, but it didn't believe in people either."

"Madmen," he said. "They say I should do no work because the star comes. I tell them stars have never hurt me, I wish I could say the same about people."

"Here is the blackness of space, the myriad stars gleaming like diamond dust or, as some people would say, like great balls of exploding hydrogen a very long way off. But then, some people would say anything."

""If you're going to suggest I try dropping twenty feet down a pitch dark tower in the hope of hitting a couple of greasy little steps which might not even still be there, you can forget it," said Rincewind sharply."

"Radiating from the book was the light that lies on the far side of darkness, the light fantastic."