"Adele Lock: I'm not in the right place here. And it will come as no surprise to you, Sir Alan, that I don't like what I'm doing. I've never been so undermined and demeaned in my life, to do some of these things. Margaret Mountford: What's demeaning about stocking an area of a shop and selling? Adele Lock: I haven't got a problem with that, I do that all the time, I'm a retailer. I have got personal emotional problems that's happening in my life, I'm sorry, this isn't for me. I'm going to leave today, so Sir Alan I'd like to make your job a lot easier, and Tim I'd like to make your job a lot easier. I'm going to leave it at that. Sir Alan Sugar: You know, it's an easy way out, Adele... Adele Lock: No, it's not an easy way out, Sir Alan. Sir Alan Sugar: It is. Look, Adele, I've been around a long time. You're a shrewd lady. Thank you for your little speech just now, but I wanna tell you this. Despite what Tim might have come up with today, you was going to go. You read it right, and the reason you was gonna go was because you took no notice of what I said outside the shop. I told you to be respectful to people, you have a problem being respectful to people, and I hope that you can contain that problem in the rest of your business life. I wish you well, I'm sorry about the problems you may have with your family and your emotions and all that stuff. It's a shame that it's gone this way. [to the rest of the team] You lot are dead lucky, that's all I can say to you. Adele Lock: *Outside the boardroom* Cheeky bastard."

"(the first-ever task briefing) Sir Alan Sugar: Okay folks, in this factory over 3 million newspapers are going to be printed in a short period of time. By about 5 o'clock tomorrow night, they're all going to be sold. What these people have learned over the years is get it sold quickly and don't have any inventory left over. Now I can see you're all smartly dressed up suited and booted, maybe because you think you've heard the word "the financial times" and you've had something in your mind grander than what I've got in mind for you. Well, it's not very grand, it's not a city job, I'm gonna take you back to the grass roots where I started. You're going out in the streets tomorrow and you're gonna be selling something. A similar commodity to these newspapers: Flowers. They're also worthless the day afterwards. I'm gonna give each team £500, and you're gonna buy £500 worth of flowers, and then you're gonna get out in the street and start selling them. Nick is gonna be following the girls' team; Margaret, the boys team and the team that sells the most and has the most money at the end of the day is gonna win. And in the team that loses, one of you is gonna get fired."

"Sir Alan Sugar: [to the candidates, in the first-ever boardroom meeting] As far as I'm concerned, what I have in front of me here are fourteen of Britain's best prospects. Quite a few thousand applied for this job: a job with me, a job that's gonna bring you a six-figure salary. But to get that job, you're gonna have to demonstrate to me your skills and leadership, business acumen, shrewdness, the lot."

"Jason Dawe (2002)"

"Since it has absolutely nothing to do with politics or religion, only with cars, it is one of the very few programs at the Burka Broadcasting Corporation still worth seeing."

"'The Stig'"

"James May (2003-2015)"

"Richard Hammond (2002-2015)"

"Jeremy Clarkson (2002-2015)"

"Peter Swanwick - Supervisor (8 episodes)"

"Angelo Muscat - The Butler (14 episodes)"

"It was a place that is trying to destroy the individual by every means possible; trying to break his spirit, so that he accepts that he is No. 6 and will live there happily as No. 6 for ever after. And this is the one rebel that they can't break."

"Patrick McGoohan - The Prisoner / Number Six (17 episodes)"

"Be seeing you."

"Fenella Fielding - The Announcer/Telephone Operator (voice only; unseen and uncredited, 6 episodes)"

"Denis Shaw - The Shop Keeper (2 episodes)"

"Colin Gordon - Number Two (2 episodes)"

"Leo McKern - Number Two (3 episodes)"

"Nathan's dad: He's fifteen years old. He's fifteen. That boy is fifteen! Stuart: So? That Jeep's only six months, and you've still gone and buggered it!"

"Marie: You’re always with him! I was supposed to be on a date and he’s ruined it!"

"Vince: I’m not with Stuart."

"Marie: You’ve kept me waiting long enough, now put him on the phone!"

"Vince: I’m sorry. It’s this boy, I promised his mother. [Answers] Hello?"

"Cameron: Right. Cause if you wanna go clubbing, I could uh..."

"Vince: Yeah... Sure. Sorry."

"Cameron: Look, I really don’t mind, but can you put the phone down? Just for a minute."

"Vince: Call waiting. He’s a busy man."

"Stuart: He’s not here."

"Martin: I’m not here."

"Stuart: Martin, it’s your wife."

"Sandra (Stuart’s PA): Are you with Martin Brooks? Cause his mobile’s switched off. His wife’s on the phone, the roof falling or something."

"Stuart: Hold on, call waiting. [Answers]"

"Marie: You’re in a bar, I can hear it! How many dates do you think I get anyway, a mother with two kids?"

"Stuart: I did phone Marie, I left a message. It’s just, it’s an emergency, I’ve gotta work."

"Marie: [sarcastically] Thank you Stuart, thank you so much. I’ve had Ben crying his eyes out, that’s all he needs, another man to abandon him."

"Stuart: Hold on, call waiting. [Answers it] Yeah?"

"Vince: Stuart, seriously, it’s your fault he’s left home. He could wander off at anywhere."

"Vince: Yeah. Listen, I’ve gotta make this call, there’s this boy and no one’s looking after him. Bit of a crisis, you don’t mind?"

"Cameron: We could go somewhere afterwards, I dunno. There’s pubs open, you’re the expert."

"Stuart: Never mind him, just think about yourself for once."

"Vince: is that Nathan? Stuart, listen, his mother had a rag on me. Do us a favor and keep an eye on him?"

"Stuart: Uh, some twat says hello."

"Nathan: [barges in] Is that Vince? Say hello for me."

"Stuart: Tell him that story about the broken leg, that always works."

"Vince: Says he’s 36, the liar. I’m sitting here with an old man. It’s like the auditions for Cocoon 3."

"Stuart: Give him six months and he'll be able to name all the Doctor Whos, in order – William Hartnell, Patrick Troughton, Jon Pertwee, Tom Baker, Peter Davison, Colin Baker, Sylvester McCoy. Vince: What about Paul McGann? Both Together: Paul McGann doesn't count!"

"Nathan: Donna, you don't know her! You don't know anything! Cos you're straight! Right? You're part of the system! Right? You're part of the fascist heterosexual orthodoxy! Donna: I'm black. And I'm a girl. Try that for a week."

"It's the exact opposite of childbirth. First you have the baby, then you get fucked."

"Can you believe it? They've got toilets in which no one's ever had sex!"

"Nathan Maloney — Charlie Hunnam"