"[Trying to talk over party noise.] Actually pretty nice little Saturday. We're going to Home Depot. Yeah buy some wallpaper, maybe get some flooring, stuff like that. Maybe Bed Bath and Beyond... I don't know! I don't know if we'll have enough time!"

"[Funnels a beer.] Fill it up again! Fill it up again! Once it hits your lips, it's so good!"

"Don't worry. The pledges will clean it up."

"No it's cool man, bring your green hat! We're going streaking!"

"[Sitting naked in the car.] Hey honey! Do you think KFC is still open?"

"In this corner, weighing in at 110 pounds and pushing 89 years of age and the recent recipient of a brand new plastic hip, Joseph "Blue" Polaski."

"[Shot in neck with tranquilizer dart, voice morphs into slow motion.] You're crazy, man. I like you, but you're crazy."

"I'm back! [Kicks a woman's shopping cart.] You know it!"

"Blue, do you understand I dont want you to die here tonight?"

"YOU'RE MA BOY BLUE!...You're Ma Boy!"

"I'm so cold...I think I see Blue! He looks glorious."

"SNOOP!! SNOOP-A-LOOP!!! [upon seeing rapper Snoop Dogg perform at the fraternity party]"

"No, it's cool, it's cool, it's cool...bring-bring your green hat, let's go! [at the same party, to one of Snoop's entourage wearing a green hat]"

"Were GOIN STREAKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Because this is a very big idea my friends. We're talking about a non-exclusive egalitarian brotherhood where community status and more importantly age have no bearing whatsoever."

"What we need to do is throw a big kick off, kick ass party."

"Max, can you earmuff for me? We are going to get so much ass here, it's going to be sick. I'm talking like crazy boy band ass."

"I have a wife and kids. Do I seem like a happy guy to you, Frankie?"

"Alright, let me be the first to say congratulations to you man; you have one vagina for the rest of your life. Real smart Frankie. Way to think it through."

"Well, why don't you give me your number in case anything happens to my wife."

"[to Frank's father in law] It takes a man to give away an angel. Your sweetheart. [wink]"

"I know a really good sand guy."