"After divorce or loss of a father, both girls and boys experience unhappiness, but especially with divorce, girls’ grief eases within a year or two, while boys’ does not."

"Whether or not we know our dad, we have a relationship with him. The relationship in our mind is our relationship."

"Your son may simultaneously feel that the male role is pressuring him to feel obligated to earn money someone else spends while he dies sooner."

"“My Father’s Glint Was His Career—He Always Did Just What He Wanted.”"

"Your son’s heroes didn’t climb traditional ladders—they built their own."

"If he followed his bliss, it’s the money you’d miss."

"The road to high pay is a toll road."

"The Japanese boys’ unconscious wisdom is: their dad as winner is really their dad as loser."

"Fatherhood was about your dad trading in the old glint in his eye—what he loved to do—for the new glint in his eye: his love for you."

"Sensitivity to the death and suffering of boys and men is in competition with our survival instinct."

"To win wars, we had to train our sons to be disposable. We honored boys if they died so we could live. We called them heroes."

"The rate of increase in male suicide in India is growing at more than nine times that of female suicide."

"The more a boy represses his feelings and puts armor around his heart, the harder it is to open our hearts to him."

"Boys’ IQs have dropped about 15 points since the 1980s."

"Whether we call it ikigai or sense of purpose, when we pursue what we believe gives life meaning, it gives us life."

"If Don Draper ended up at Esalen in a state of introspection about what it means to be a man, maybe that’s where he should start."

"Suicide now takes “more lives than war, murder, and natural disasters combined, stealing more than 36 million years of healthy life” around the world."

"Here’s why I predict emotional intelligence will be paramount for your son’s future: the more sophisticated artificial intelligence becomes, the more we will yearn for humans to fill the emotional intelligence void."

"When both sexes are offered pay should they assess the feelings of others accurately, the empathy gender gap disappears! The implication? The capacity for empathy and emotional intelligence is latent inside boys and men; we just have to let guys know we’ll value them for focusing on it."

"Japan has vastly increased its vocational education programs, with 23 percent of Japan’s high school graduates studying at vocational schools. The result: 99.6 percent of Japanese vocational students received jobs upon graduation."

"Both bullies and the bullied have three things in common: both come from negative family, school, and community environments; both have low self-esteem; and both have poor social skills."

"That is our genetic heritage. The process led to our survival in the past, but is not needed for our future. But since we can’t change evolution overnight, let’s help your son through the transition."

"In the United States, by eighth grade, 41 percent of girls are at least “proficient” in writing, while only 20 percent of boys are."

"Since empathy and emotional intelligence can be taught, and these skills are key to preparing our sons for the professions that will be in the greatest demand, we need to integrate this curriculum into our schools in the formative years."

"While boys who are motivated can become many of society’s most constructive forces—becoming inventors and implementers of what they invent (the Amazons, Apples, Facebooks, Microsofts, and Googles)—boys whose energies are poorly channeled can become society’s most destructive forces—our serial killers and prisoners."

"The challenge for your son’s grandpa was grandpa’s job going nowhere; the challenge for your son is his job going elsewhere."

"Your son will enter an economy that has made a transition from muscle to mental—or from muscle to microchip."

"Whether through bigorexia or choosing the death professions, our sons, like our daughters, are often responding to what they feel will give them more approval and respect."

"Over the last forty years, the median annual earnings of a boy with just a high school diploma dropped 26 percent."

"The harder it is to find a job, the harder it is to find a woman."

"Worldwide, boys are 50 percent more likely than girls to fail to meet basic proficiency in any of the three core subjects of reading, math, and science."

"The women’s movement warned every girl how marriage can seduce her to make a sacrifice of her career. But no one warned every boy how marriage can seduce him to make a sacrifice in his career"

"In aggregate, these jobs might be thought of as “glass cellar” jobs—all-male, because it is almost exclusively our sons who are willing to risk death so their family will have a better life."

"There is probably no better evidence of the increase of the boy crisis as a mental health problem than the fact that the US jail and prison population increased by more than 700 percent between 1973 and 2013."

"We often allow that the disproportionate percentage of young black men in prison may reflect our racism, but rarely contemplate whether, since the other half of “black men” is “men,” that it may also reflect our sexism."

"By 2015, in good economic times, boys and men were committing suicide three and a half times more often than women."

"To date, our prison debate has focused on rehabilitation versus incarceration, rather than prevention versus imprisonment."

"Suicides increase as the pressures of the male role and hormones increase. Before puberty, the suicide rates among males and female are about equal. However, between ten and fourteen, boys commit suicide at almost twice the rate of girls."

"Between fifteen and nineteen, boys commit suicide at four times the rate of girls; and between twenty and twenty-four, the rate of male suicide is between five and six times that of females."

"Prison spending has increased at five times the rate of spending per grade school student."

"Worth less, men considered themselves worthless."

"When a boy drives down the serpentine road of mental health, feeling depressed and isolated because he feels no one who knows the real him loves him, no one needs him, and there’s no hope of that changing, he may one day find a cliff and drive off."

"The murder-suicide combination of school and other mass shootings is largely young white boys’ way of driving off the cliff at the end of mental health’s tortuous road."

"While no vision of the future can be perfect, the goal of The Boy Crisis is to integrate the half century of national discussion about the challenges faced by girls and women with an equally nuanced national discussion about those facing boys and men."

"The increase in suicide among white males led to as many white males’ lives lost to suicide as have been lost to AIDS."

"The Great Law of the Iroquois is that our most sacred duty is to think seven generations ahead in making any decision—to be aware of whether the decisions we make today will benefit not just ourselves and our children, but our children’s children several generations into the future."

"More black boys between ten and twenty are killed by homicide than by the next nine leading causes of death combined."

"It is only now that boys and men under fifty are twice as likely to die as girls and women the same age."

"When grandpa was a dad, no research documented why a dad’s typical style of hands-on parenting, such as roughhousing, or his expectation that his children serve rather than be served, was so crucial to his children’s development."

"Young men between twenty-five and thirty-one are 66 percent more likely than their female counterparts to be living with their parents."