"In the wake of JD Vance admitting he 'created' the pet-eating story, and as a result of the very real threats the communities and people he has targeted are now under... I am calling on him to RESIGN as our Senator."

"Vance did not get this extremist ideology from his Appalachian upbringing or—needless to say—Yale Law. It was incubated in America's tech capital, San Francisco, where he forged crucial ties with Thiel, Yarvin, and David Sacks, the longtime Thiel associate and pro-Putin crusader who recently hosted a Trump fundraiser at his mansion in Pacific Heights. And if Vance ends up in the White House, it will be with $45 million in monthly campaign contributions from Musk, who already made a $44 billion in-kind contribution by gutting San Francisco-based Twitter and transforming it into a right-wing misinformation weapon."

"Historically, the choice of the vice president makes no difference. You're voting for the president. And you can have a vice president who's outstanding in every way—and I think JD is, I think that all of them would have been—but you're not voting that way, you're voting for the president."

"J.D. is kissing my ass. He wants my support so bad."

"Vance seems to assume that large numbers of native-born white people don’t constitute ethnic enclaves, and that communities of immigrants somehow do (and he’s clearly uninterested in understanding the forces, positive and negative, that often make newcomers cluster). MAGA has been a largely white movement of non-urban people who seem to think, like Trump himself, that people unlike them are scary and that there is only safety in homogeneity. So if you bend it around and maybe turn it inside out, there’s some “she made him do it” logic to Vance’s declaration “What happens when you have massive amounts of illegal immigration? It actually starts to create ethnic conflict. It creates higher crime rates.” It’s just that the conflict and crime doesn’t come from the immigrants."

"It turns out he’s pretty good at parroting racist lies like the spineless dips--t that he is."

"Not me. They’re talking about J.D."

"JD Vance, do you understand why there was a sudden job opening for running mate on the GOP ticket? They tried to kill your predecessor. They tried to kill him because he would not follow Trump’s plan to destroy and nullify the votes of millions of Americans."

"America doesn’t have to constantly police every region of the world. We should empower people to police their own regions of the world. One: We would save a lot of money. Two: We’d save a lot of focus."

"Our interest very much is in not going to war with Iran. It would be a huge distraction of resources. It would be massively expensive to our country,"

"In two days, we are going to take out the trash in Washington, D.C., and the trash’s name is Kamala Harris."

"Eggs, when Kamala Harris took office, were short of $1.50 a dozen. Now a dozen eggs will cost you around $4."

"The rules were that you guys weren’t going to fact-check. And since you’re fact-checking me, I think it’s important to say what’s actually going on."

"I don't think stupid social media activity should ruin a kid’s life. We shouldn't reward journalists who try to destroy people. Ever."

"If you go back to World War II, if you go back to World War I, if you go back to every major conflict in human history, they all end with some kind of negotiation."

"I don't think most Americans, whether they like her music, are fans of her or not, are going to be influenced by a billionaire celebrity who I think is fundamentally disconnected from their interests and the problems of most Americans."

"Well, I've finally made it."

"[On the economy] You don't turn the Titanic around overnight. It takes time to fix what was broken."

"The American media totally ignored this stuff, until Donald Trump and I started talking about cat memes. If I have to create stories so that the American media actually pays attention to the suffering of the American people, then that’s what I’m going to do."

"Even when people express views outside your own country, and even when those people are very influential – and trust me, I say this with all humour – if American democracy can survive ten years of Greta Thunberg's scolding you guys can survive a few months of Elon Musk."

"While it’s tempting, and I’m sure it would make some big headlines, don’t worry any-ev-everybody I’m not going to try to take off my shirt here."

"We're going to defeat Donald Trump, the career criminal and incorrigible recidivist con man and his pet chameleon. JD Vance."

"President Trump and I are proud to be the most pro-worker Republican ticket in history."

"They couldn't beat him at the ballot box, so they tried to bankrupt him. They failed at that, so they tried to impeach him. They failed at that. So they tried to put him in prison, and they even tried to kill him."

"I’ve said a lot of stupid things on camera, sometimes when you’re in the public eye you make mistakes and again. I think the best way to deal with it is to laugh at ourselves, laugh at this stuff and try to have some fun in politics."

"I think a lot of European nations were right about our invasion of Iraq. And frankly, if the Europeans had been a little more independent, and a little more willing to stand up, then maybe we could have saved the entire world from the strategic disaster that was the American-led invasion of Iraq."

"Months ago, I raised the issue of Haitian illegal immigrants draining social services and generally causing chaos all over Springfield, Ohio. Reports now show that people have had their pets abducted and eaten by people who shouldn’t be in this country."

"Seriously, we need to release the Epstein list. That is an important thing."

"I don’t think they’re aliens. I think they’re demons anyway, but that’s a longer discussion. Well, look, I think that celestial beings who fly around, who do weird things to people. I think that the desire to describe everything celestial, everything is otherworldly, to describe it as aliens. I mean, every great world religion, including Christianity, the one that I believe in, has understood that there are weird things out there and there are things that are very difficult to explain. I naturally go ― when I hear about, sort of, extra natural phenomenon, that’s where I go to ― to the Christian understanding that there’s a lot of good out there, but there’s also some evil out there. And I think that one of the devil’s great tricks is to convince people he never existed."

"I'm telling you, every single person who’s watching this, the Trump campaign is in a very, very good spot."

"Consistently what you’ve seen in 2016 and 2020, is that the media uses fake polls to drive down Republican turnout and to create dissension and conflict within Republican voters."

"She’s not doing a very good job."

"We can't worry about polls."

"I just don’t understand a person in American politics in 2024 who’s whining about what happened to them instead of using their leadership and using their influence to make the lives of American citizens better."

"I go back and forth between thinking Trump is a cynical asshole like Nixon who wouldn't be that bad (and might even prove useful) or that he's America's Hitler. How's that for discouraging?"

"I hate the police."

"I think that I'm going to vote third party because I can't stomach Trump. I think that he's noxious and is leading the white working class to a very dark place. And ultimately I just don't share Hillary Clinton's politics."

"Donald Trump can point to four years of successful leadership and say "I delivered rising prices"."

"Average new car costs nearly $50,000 a year."

"Sounds like we got some fans and some haters."

"We've endorsed J.P. — right? J.D. Mandel, and he’s doing great."

"There are many lies the corporate media tells about President Trump. One of the most glaring is that he's impulsive or short-tempered. Anyone who has seen him operate under pressure knows that's ridiculous."

"President Trump has done more than anyone in my lifetime to earn the trust of the movement he leads. I am proud to stand beside him."

"We didn't not serve in the Marine Corps to go and fight Vladimir Putin because he didn't believe in transgender rights [...] Which is what the U.S. State Department is saying is a major problem with Russia."

"If your worldview tells you that it's bad for women to become mothers but liberating for them to work 90 hours a week in a cubicle at the New York Times or Goldman Sachs, you've been had."

"I have to beat up on the UK – just one additional thing. I was talking with a friend recently and we were talking about, you know, one of the big dangers in the world, of course, is nuclear proliferation, though, of course, the Biden administration doesn't care about it. And I was talking about, you know, what is the first truly Islamist country that will get a nuclear weapon, and we were like, maybe it's Iran, you know, maybe Pakistan already kind of counts, and then we sort of finally decided maybe it's actually the UK, since Labour just took over."

"Trump’s Best Foreign Policy? Not Starting Any Wars"

"[On attacks on U.S. troops in the Middle East from forces connected to Iran] They have attacked, certain militia groups have attacked and I think we've done the right thing, a proportionate response. If they hit us, we have to hit them back but if you're talking about an attack on the Iranian mainland, that would be a significant escalation right now that would be a mistake."

"The professors are the enemy."

"I don't really care what happens to Ukraine one way or another."